Introductions - New Members Start Here

[Archives1]

Vestalm,

Work with your doctors to try to find a cause and decide what to do about it. Granted, incontinence is embarrassing. However, the good old competitive free enterprise economy should change that in a hurry. Walk down the aisles of any big box store, and note all the shelf space devoted to incontinence wares. Shelf space is an expensive commodity; the products on it must earn the right to be there. Products that do not sell are quickly removed, and they're not re-ordered. The shelves full of incontinence products support the insight that there are tens of millions of us in the USA alone, who need and use them. We're not all doddering nursing home residents; we're active, working, playing, contributing to our families and communities. We just happen to need different underwear.

 

[Archives1]

Thanks Patrick! You're right. I'm adapting and I'm hopeful that some answers will come with the workup. In the meantime, I'm coping as well as can be expected. I'm learning a TON, that's for sure! One step at a time...

 

[Archives1]

Vestalm,

Good luck and keep us informed.

 

[Archives1]

I know I just found out from my urologist I have an overactive bladder, I had been concerned as I thought I may have a retrocele, but getting on in y ears did not want to have surgery, it was very embarassing at times he put me on oxybutin and he recommended this group would be very helpful, glad to have found the group, Iris

 

[Archives1]

Happy to have found this site. My problem is I pee ALL night long. Usually every hour and twenty minutes. I'm so exhausted due to not sleeping thru. I have always gotten up once or twice a night but now it's constantly. I haven't seen a doctor or done anything for treatment. You folks are my first attempt at finding information and advice. I also cannot wait longer than 5 minutes to go pee
during the day or I will pee myself. It's the all night pee-athon that is disrupting my life. I'm 62, retired and tired. I've thought about just sleeping on the toilet! Anyone out there having this same problem? Someone suggested a post-menopausal cream. ??? Help!

 

[Archives1]

I had the same problem when I reached the sixties, I had surgery at the time, the doc split my bladder I had to have an indwelling catheter at the time, that was several years ago, I am now 78 years of age and using the bathroom frequently, the urologist I see has put me onto oxybutinin, the medication is helping me and could not use the vaginal cream as it has sulfate in it, hope you can find the help you need, my doc recommended this site to me. I know how you feel about sleeping on the toilet,I used to get comfortable in bed then have to get up again Iris

 

[Archives1]

Pamela,

I leak continually, because I had a urinary sphincterotomy in 1999. I too would be tied to a bathroom 24/7/365 if I did not wear protection. Heavy night diapers give me a good night's sleep, and my daytime protection enables me to function almost normally in public. Good luck.

 

[Archives1]

Hello, my name is Betty Lynn and I have fecal incontinence from a 4th degree vaginal tear many, many years ago. I have tried P.T., Intone device, etc, to no avail. I am desperate! I am now pursuing a surgically implanted device known as "FENIX" and have to travel out of state to find a physician who performs this surgery. It is FDA approved for humanitarian reasons at this time so I will see what my insurance will cover. I have lived way too long in this uncomfortable state and am willing to try anything!

 

[Archives1]

Hi! New here. I struggle with some stress incontince due to uterine fibroids (some urine but most of my problems revolve around finding discrete ways to contain the bleeding), and I also care for my parents who are in their 80's and also struggle with incontinence. My Dad also lives with a left kidney nephrostomy (since 2009) due to the accidental surgical severing of his ureter that occurred during a search for the cause of "suspicious" cells in his urine.

Stay positive! I'm an advocate of independence and prefer using the term "disposable undergarment" vs. "diaper." Hope to learn a lot and share knowledge.

 

[Archives1]

The problem with the term, "disposable undergarment" is that many of us, myself included, wear washables, because of concerns about the environment, and comfort and the superior absorbency of cloth.

 

[Archives1]

I think it's ok for everyone to call them whatever they are comfortable with. That being said, it was my understanding that the standard accepted terminology was briefs (diapers), protective underwear (pull-ups) and pads (pads). Is that not true? And are washables still called briefs, or simply washables, or something else?

 

[Archives1]

Hello everyone. I've read some of your posts and its nice to not feel quite so alone with these sorts of problems. I'll try to keep it short. This started several years ago with an inability to void (pee) I put off complaining about it because of embarrassment so... by the time I saw my GP I was pretty well plugged up and started CIC (Catheters) My embarrassment made the whole thing much more difficult then it needed to be. Needless to say it was a true relief to have them but I was a bit horrified carrying around the full sized ones (to work etc) A PA (of Urology) tried to do urodynamics but the tiny test catheter was plugging me up enough that there wasn't any flow to measure so the only thing we learned was that I had a small bladder and it was plugged. The Doctors all said BPH and I was schedualed for that but... The PA said I ought to insist on having a biopse and at the same time my GP was having my PSA tested and it moved up for the first time all rather quickly. So, Biopse was Positive and based on the experiences of my fathers side of the family the cancer was the nasty kind. I went for the old school surgery (no robots) and am very thankful that the sugeon appears to have gotten it all out. I had leakage issues, did kegals until my eyes were crossed but still had problems. I just bought women's bladder control pads (Blaim it on the wife if anyone asked) (I know... How sad) anyhow that has been going on for quite some time. I think the cancer surgery did some kind of number on my awareness of fullness. I seem to end up at 1/3rd full. There has to be a word for that. I can't remember what its called but there is some term for urination during sexual climax. This was like a 10 on the embarass-o-meter and I did some reading about all of this and decided to look up the PA who saved my arse. She found that I was not emptying the bladder which made sense because I could go to the bathroom zip up my pants, walk into another room and have a moderate sized leak for no obvious reason. So she gave me a long list of options. The Surgical ones (Slings? I don't understand how that works, internal cuffs) I asked to do a pass on surgery. At least for now. I've kind of had my share of being operated on in the last 10 years. So clamps were discussed, we tried two drugs trying to figure out a solution to the leakage but... It still left the problem of not emptying my bladder fully So... I'm back to cathing. Since I did it long enough pre cancer its not a big deal. And I'm very happy to note that the place that makes the catheters I use has made two small pocket sized ones (Yea!!!) so I'm not so freaked out about someone asking me "Whats THAT?" Did I say this was going to be short? Well anyway I think this is a success story. Fully emptying the tank means there is nothing to leak when I we get intimate and I sleep a normal length of time and don't wake up running into the bathroom etc. If I CIC often enough it seems like I never have enough to leak. Or at least so far. *This is all very new to me. Its just weeks that I've been doing this. Anyway HELLO! Hope everyone wasn't bored to death reading this. Ha

 

[Archives1]

My introduction. Posting here is a difficult step for me to take. I am too young for this – my 24th birthday is this month. But since there are many others on this forum that share in incontinence, I will give it a try. Firstly, a bit of history. I was an occasional bed wetter, until about age 10. The doctor at the time told my parents I had an immature bladder. In retrospect, it sounds like an excuse to me. Then finally, bed wetting resolved itself. Never looked back. I had one UTI when I was 18 that got me sick with a fever and the doc prescribed Cipro that fixed everything. By the time I was 20 I began to notice a bit of frequency in my need to pee. I managed frequency by always making sure that I knew where the restrooms where. It was never a problem in while taking classes or part time work. Within 2 hours or so I had to pee so I would get to the restroom and there was never any incontinence. That is how it worked for me. Makes me wonder if perhaps my bladder is still immature or just too small? So I kept telling myself that I don't have a pee problem worthy of any medical attention. I took a job in the restaurant business, first waiting tables and then the serving the bar. A restaurant is all about serving its customers in a timely manner and often things can get rather busy. So there is not an opportunity to run off for a pee whenever the need arises. Imagine the onset of urgency at work, and putting off the feeling because you are serving. What happens is that urgency quickly escalates in severity faster than a restroom break can be realized. So sometimes I have made a bad decision and put it off to finish a serve and then something bad happens. Yes, my pants would get wet. I feel like a child when it happens. There – I admitted it. But that should not happen. There must be a problem of sorts. Online self-diagnosis leads me to believe that it is OAB. So in summary I can manage the urgency as I said but the incontinence if it happens because I have to wait is embarrassing me to death. Its my own fault I know. So what am I doing about it? Of course the least embarrassing. I am “retraining” my bladder to hold longer. Thank you incontinence Web sites. It is actually a good plan as it is starting to work. At least while I am at home and can get to the bathroom in seconds. However if I am hold training while taking a walk on the river walk, for some reason I can't manage the same duration as I do at home before needing to pee hits the limit. Why? So what I desire to learn on this forum is if there is a reason the urgency takes control quicker when a restroom is not close by verses when at home. Does the brain have some influence over what appears on the surface to be only a physical problem?

 

[Archives1]

Melanie, of course there is a neurological element to OAB. I am not an expert but I'll tell you my view. Many people with OAB have psychological triggers for example it's very common for people with OAB to experience more urgency when they are trying to put keys in the door to their homes. The brain and bladder connection is obviously off if you get the signal to go with urgency. You should be able to feel the need well before it's urgent... That's just what I think. I have MS so I have zero sensation of when I have to go. That's a neurological thing. I would ask a doctor for sure!

 

[Archives1]

I think its fair to say this problem embarasses most of us and like some of you I avoided seeing a doctor about it. Having some of these tests might sound bad but they really aren't that bad. The effect of not getting some advice from an expert can be a disaster. There is some reason that this is happening. The answer might be something simple that can be treated and your done. The problem might be something serious like cancer or whatever and not dealing with it make the solution less and less likely to succeed and no one wants that.

Melanie I had a test called Urodynamics done and they were able to tell me that one of the issues was that I had a small bladder. Less then 300 mL. I also can't empty it so it tops off (Fills) without much fluid intake so I understand your sort of problem. I've been working with a PA in Urology that is good with chicken male patients so we've found some solution and are working on something else at the same time. Before all this I was having problems voiding and that turned out to be cancer. So - getting tested and getting some good advice saved me from croaking.

See a doctor. If they freak you out? See a different one. Just see someone please!

 

[Archives1]

Benfrank and Jay, thank you for your replies. Your advise is making me pause to think about my options. In a way, I am fortunate because my problems pale in comparison to each of yours. But yet, here you are trying to help me. Best wishes to you both.

 

[Archives1]

Thanks for saying that Melanie. I consider myself to be in a really good place. No cancer (All chomped out yea!) The bladder retention thing appears to be solved by CICing (self cathing) and I've learned how to do that so its not a chore or painful. The leakage issue seems to have gone away with the cathing. I guess its not having much left in the bladder that makes leakage less likely?

Anyway - Good luck Melanie. I hope you find a good Uro Doc that your comfortable talking with. I was fortunate to have a GDoc who is like a world of calmness get me to the right people and who kept an eye on my PSA (Great for high blood pressure) The Uro I see is cut from the same cloth so... I hope you have someone like that to talk about your problems.

I thought I would mention some of the things I've done and maybe this will give you confidence to try seeing someone knowing what sorts of things happen.

I think one of the standard operating procedures is they have you urinate into a toilet that measures force and volume. Nothing weird or creepy. Then they have a nurse do a sonogram (Like the sort of gadget they look at unborn babies with) to measure whats left after your done urinating. Here is where my results were not so great. I thought I was empty but still retained a lot of urine. Like 100mL +

If your not urinating with enough force (Or for other reasons) they might have you do urodynamics. This involves a rectal gadget that has something to do with measuring pelvic muscles? And then a small cathater that they use to fill up your bladder and to measure the pressure and capacity of the bladder when they let it drain. Its all very low key and done by people who do this regularly so don't sweat this (If you ever have to do it) after that if they are concerned about things like bladder or kidney stones they might do a visual inspection of your bladder but this is all done using numbing gel so the discomfort level ought to be zero (or close to it)

Thats all there is to it unless they want to do imaging where I would warn you about one thing. They have a very loud speaker in the machine and if your not ready for it you may wet yourself when this very loud voice says "DON'T MOVE" ;-)

 

[Archives1]

Hi I'm Karen and the mother of a 24 year old that has wet the bed since childhood. Years ago he tried some medications that has little effect. He has since been to see a specialist who prescribed drugs and lifestyle changes but he was reluctant (or too lazy) to do either. He wont wear protective pants and does not clean up any of the daily mess so as a result I am cleaning waterproof bedding and mattress daily, and smelly wet clothes. i have tried just letting him learn to deal with the issue...but he doesn't and the mess is all the more difficult to clean up if I don't keep on top if it. I am at my whits end now. I feel like i am enabling it because I clean up the mess. I also worry about his ability to look after himself when he eventually leaves home.

 

[Archives1]

Good morning, evening!

I am new here, as might be expected on the new memebers forum.

Off and on for years I have had the occasional accident in my sleep. Normally I would write it off to a dream of using the restroom in the woods, etc. These incidents were really far apart, some for as much as 7 or 8 years(I am 54) and they were always isolated events. About 6 months ago I had the regular dream and voided in the bed.

About 2 weeks ago had another accident. This one however, was followed by several more on successive nights. 6 nights and only one dry.

I have been to my dr who was not helpful at all with the exception of making referral to urologist which will take nearly two weeks to hear back from my insurance and then who knows how long until an appt may be made. So I am looking t maybe 4-6 weeks sleeping in diap until then.

I would like to run this by you as a potential culprit. When I was 20 I was involved in a motorcycle accident and broke/fractured 3 lumbar vertebrae and have serious issues with coccyx pain ever since. Could it be possible for this issue to be a major factor in my latest struggles. I have read that Coccyx injuries and the lumbar vertebrae can affect both enuresis (urine incontinence) and fecal incontinence.

Of course the issue continues. One strange and seemingly unheard of caveat is the fecal/bowel involvement. Here is what happens, I wake up to find myself pushing/straining to empty bowels.

Any suggestions as to why this is happening to me, both the bedwetting and the bowel elimination, please feel free to share.

My wife has been phenomenal through all this and makes me realize just how much I really do love her and how much I need her. She has been understanding and sympathetic and brings up things I would have not thought of--like an emergency bag with change of clothes and a diaper in case of an accident or being stranded on the road.

Any way, she is my right hand, my heart.

 

[Archives1]

Hi, this looks like a good site to share experiences, ideas, and best tools to manage incontinence. I have a neurogenic bladder from an unknown cause however somehow when my tests revealed this the nurse doing the testing said I can tell you have had this for a very long time and quite possibly since birth. How they know this is way above my pay grade. Anyway I manage day and night with a combination of cloth diapers with plastic pants overnight and disposable briefs during the day. I have always been in nighT diapers but chose to go 24/7 about 9 years ago and am so happy I did. I used to always have a low level of stress and pressure about finding somewhere to go 15+ times every day and regularly leaking and trying to hide my wet spots. Now I don't even have to think about it, with no stress or pressure whatsoever. The only thing I have to remember is to change into a dry diaper every 8-12 hours. Life suddenly became so much easier and any concern I initially had about wearing diapers soon went away. I don't hide from my needs nor glorify them. Plenty of friends of mine know I wear diapers and because of that I can travel with friends and have no concern about sharing rooms or whatever. They know, they see, they pretty much ignore it as I do.