Who Knew!!??

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You know what you like to wear for protection. Today you need a pack so you'll have enough for the weekend. You don't need anything else so you can't hide them under food in your cart or basket. Confidently you go to store and find a pack. You're happy they're in your size and the style you like. Now it's time to go home! You pick up the pack and turn down the nearest aisle on your way to the cashier. Almost there! Then you turn the corner and....BANG!:O...It's that friend you haven't seen in a couple of years. Or it's that nice person at work who always greets you and smiles and you enjoy talking politics or sports with him/her....maybe it's your nosy next door neighbor....your child's Sunday school teacher. Of course they're looking right at you and at the pack of diapers you're carrying in your arms. Soooo what do you say? If you're like me you'll come up with something witty and to the point ....ten minutes later! And at that point you're' well on your way home!) So what would YOU say?

 

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You tell them you are getting them for your father at the nursing home.

 

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"Hi, I'm just carrying out a little work of charity here".

(If you really feel that you have to say anything).

What did you say??

 

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Hi libbymac, I like your answer and there can be an element of truth to it. But I neglected to make something clear in my post. This scenario has never happened to me (at least not yet!)I guess you can say I like to be prepared! Also chubbyscout's suggestion of getting them for your dad at the nursing home is probably the most universally acceptable answer. Of course you're free to substitute another person if your acquaintance in the store knows your dad is no longer living.

 

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i order on the internet for that very reason. it was about 7 years ago that i bought in a store and in those days i did that as a form of self harm. I’m really messed up that way. but fortunately i don’t have friends and never ran into anyone who knew me. it was just as embarrassing with the cashier seeing anyway. like i said now i order on line but sometimes the package comes with just enough loose tape or holes in the package so that the snoopy doorman can “accidentally” see whats in it. i still don’t discuss it with anyone and that shows my personality and why i’m gunna have great difficulty dealing with my additional non secret secrets these days. what would i say? i really don’t know. i’d really just have to jump in to it and react.

 

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One of our neighbors and I ran into each other in the incontinence isles in Walmart. Was and interesting encounter. We both smiled and said hi and grabbed what we needed and went about shopping.
Another time I was in Walmart I was putting a big bag of depends pull ups on the belt and the younger cashier asked me how long a bag lasted me I said a few weeks as they were not my primary use ones. She told me when she gets the large bag they don’t last very long. Very nice person. Was humbling that she shared that info with me.
Guess you never know who needs to wear protection. Even the check out people at Walmart.

 

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Hi Jim, I guess running into your neighbor in the incontinence section can be an "interesting encounter" to say the least! Now the secret is out! And I think that was a most appropriate way to handle that. Just keep on going about your business !And your encounter with the cashier was also one-of-a-kind as well. I don't think something like that is quite so bad. You found out that you two share something and then it isn't too embarrassing. If it happened to me I would walk away feeling that not only are we sharing something but that I had helped someone in the process. By the way I really don't buy supplies at Wal-Mart except maybe on occasion.

 

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Myself, I wouldn’t acknowledge anything or mention anything. If they said something, I would provide brief info and use it as an educational experience. I find that people are probably more embarrassed to bring it up then we are to talk about it. One way or the other, if they tell others they are off my friends list. I would also be tempted to write a scathing Facebook post tagging them, but am too nice for that.

 

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I was scared this would happen to me but ever since I became a cashier, I stopped worrying. If I meet someone, at a store I really don't discuss with them what I'm buying because most likely we're just catching up with each other. As a cashier, I've learned that the only thing we really care about is the clock and the lovely time it'll be so we can go home

 

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Hi 23, I didn't know you're a cashier! I suppose if you did meet someone you know going through your line you would be interested in asking how they've been and how their kids are. By the time that is done you've rung them up and they are on their way home. By the time five o'clock comes you've probably forgotten you saw so-and-so today, unless it was for a fleeting moment when you two asked each other how things are going.
And Mightychi also has a good way to handle such an encounter. Just provide a little info and let it go at that!

 

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Okay friends: It is 2020 and online shopping is where it is at. Granted before moving from FL. to PA. I did have a shop that I could get ABENA products at, but now I am back to online shopping. We have Xp Medical, Northshore Care and one that is close to me that I have been using LLmedico. LLmedico is a mom and pops incontinence shop down by Philly PA. that is now run by the founders adult children. AND THEY SHIP FOR FREE.. (Not always in desecrate boxing got the order my mom placed for me in the original box with all the logos out there and the carry handle on the side was ripped by the carrier and you could see what was inside) But it only take 1-2 days to get anything from LLmedico to my apartment so I like that a lot. LLmedico has both a loyalty program and an auto ship discount (5%). You get money to spend on your next order (They take HSA and FSA) and the loyalty program gave me almost $3 back on a case of Adena L4 plastic backed. So not bad

 

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I think we make a far worse situation if we keep this quiet. There are millions of us who wear protection and if it were to happen to me, I would explain I have medical conditions. But I find it is far more embarrassing for the person asking who they are for as quite honestly it's none of their business.

 

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I think we make a far worse situation if we keep this quiet. There are millions of us who wear protection and if it were to happen to me, I would explain I have medical conditions. But I find it is far more embarrassing for the person asking who they are for as quite honestly it's none of their business.

You are very right. At work, it seems that those that have figured it out truly don't care. Those that have to know because they are in leadership or security are sympathetic and understanding of the nature of what I am going though. But most don't care or have no clue. The big reason that I order online now is that when you live in a one red light town with not even a Wal-mart within 40 minutes of me than no one carries anything that will work for my needs. But when I was buying in Florida. The lady and her husband that ran the store both new my order by heart and truly carried about what was being sold. I do miss that side of it.

 

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Great posts by FLGuy and laalaauk! If you run into someone you know I would think that just saying you have a condition would suffice. Maybe some humor such as adding, "It's a mysterious condition that even I don't know why I have it." As laalaauk pointed out, there are millions of us who wear protection. And guess what? Those numbers are growing! But you're right, I think the person asking "who are these for?" would be far more embarrassed by asking a question that is none of their business! Although there are times when something you don't want to slip out does, even for the most well-intentioned person. And that's a moment you truly wish you could take back but can't!
I also agree with FLGuy that online shopping is where it's at these days. Nothing is going to change that. The selection and overall quality is much better than buying on the local economy.
Where I live there are mostly supermarkets like Publix and Winn Dixie and the big box stores. The only ones left around here are Walmart and Target. They don't stock any of the really well-made products but what they do have will do in a pinch!

 

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i buy online. problem solved.

 

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Interesting scenario you put out there @billliveshere.

Since I mostly only wear protection when I am not sleeping at my place just in case that is the night my occasional bedwetting decides to show up I do not often have to buy a product, but when I do it usually is at a store. Since I am not a heavy wetter Depends RealFits work for me and a 20 pack will last me a long. time.

I've never had an encounter with a friend while buying my products but did have a few convos in a store back when I was around 20 and using GoodNites. One time, when I was in college, I went to buy a pack of GoodNites to have for my trip to visit some relatives. I went to like a CVS and grabbed a pack of boys LG-XL GoodNites and then got some toothpaste and deodorant that I needed for the trip too. Not a lot of items and the GoodNites pack was def obvious to anyone walking by me.

When I got up to the register I waited in line and when I put my stuff on the belt the cashier picked up the last time to be rung up for the person, a lady and two kids, in front of me and that caused the belt to move forward since the little electrical eye thing was not blocked. There went my GoodNites, toothpaste and deodorant rolling up to the cashier and away from me. She picked up the GoodNites and then asked the lady if they were part of her items. The lady looked at them and said no. Then the cashier and the lady both looked back at me. I probably got a little red. I really wasn't embarrassed about buying them but when they both looked back at me I got a little embarrassed. Now to be clear they didn't look back in any kind of way other then you'd naturally look back at someone. It was all me that flooded my head with thoughts of, they know I am a bedwetter, and the kids know too, everyone knows I pee my bed. You know the irrational thoughts that come up in that type of situation.

So the cashier finished up the lady's transaction and she and her kids leave. It was only me in line then and the cashier rang my items up and told me how much it was. As she was putting my items in the bag she says, "So you have a bedwetter in the house? My brother was a bedwetter too, even in high school." I was like, "Uhm yes, my little cousin is staying with us." She goes, "Well tell your cousin it's not his fault and he will get it under control someday. That's what we told my brother when he'd get upset about his bedwetting." I'm like, "Umm, Okay, I'll do that, thanks."

So yeah that is my awkward buying GoodNites story.

 

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At least the cashier bought the story and didn't give you a funny look! That was lucky you just happened to have that cashier on the day you were there. It certainly could've been worse! And if I ever have an "audience" like you did I think I would have turned red myself! But with all of the advertising these days and the fact that millions of us have to wear some kind of protection maybe someday soon such scenarios will become history. Here's hoping!

 

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Funny, I was just going to type a reply when my Amazon delivery came, including some DryNites bed mats. My leakage is very minimal at night (basically after every time I get up to go to the toilet) so my mum suggested that just using a mat at night would save my skin and lessen the amount of products I was using.

The courier said, "wait, there's something else" and it turns out they come in their own box which proclaims in massive letters - "DryNites - 7 Bed Mats" which comes with a massive picture of one on a bed in case anyone is in any doubt what they are for. I could have died. Still, at least the neighbours didn't see. Proof that buying online isn't always the less embarrassing option!

The only real anxiety I ever had when buying products in a store was when I was living and working abroad. Everyone knew I was there on my own so if I bumped into any coworkers I wouldn't have had a real excuse. Never happened luckily. To be honest, I think I would have just been honest and said "I have IBS issues and had an embarrassing accident in a hotel so don't want to damage the mattress as it would be really annoying to have to replace it."

Now I'm living back in the UK I'd imagine the elderly relative or young relative excuse would work well. I've never had any funny looks when I've had to buy products. One of the bonuses of being in my 20s having incontinence issues is that I guess no one would imagine they were for me. The downside I've found though is using disabled toilets as I imagine most people figure I don't 'need' to use them.

 

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@billliveshere

For sure. Was a just a mater of fact convo even if I was totally embarrassed inside and over thinking it. I even thought afterwards that maybe she thought they were for me, even with my story, and that was why she told me about her brother's bedwetting until high school and that they told him that it wasn't his fault and that he'd get it under control someday.

Even though I was 20 at the time I looked more like. Was 17 or 18. I did think it was interesting that she was the one to start the convo by saying there must be a bedwetter in the house and immediately say that her brother was one into high school.

 

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@Sci_Fi_Fan

Well that was awkward. Course the delivery guy probably has seen all kinds of boxes used to ship stuff. Might have even thought it was something else and the sender was just using that box.

I could see how being in a place where the few people that you do know know that you are there on your own. No playing that off on buying for a relative.