PTSD Episodes

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I had a horrible dream the other night. Which i get from time to time. And maybe its related to past abuse from childhood but i saw my abuser in the grocery store and i froze and i could move and just pissed myself and couldnt stop it. Whenever i get scared or have a PTSD episode - i end up getting an overactive bladder in real life; but nothing to the extent of having an actual "accident". I mean these "pee" dreams happen once or twice a year cause i can't remember the last time i had one - but i know it wasnt the same one i had last night.

Usually my nightmares involve the actual abuse itself. It just was on my mind cause i hate the feeling of helplessness in those types of situation and it makes me think if i actually saw her in real life - i would wet my pants. Idk.

To give you a background on myself - i have been a bedwetter for the past couple years due to PTSD - but these are just some fears I've had.
 
Hi Honeeecombs
This is an under recognized issue in the medical community that does cause bedwetting.
A member here Alasouth posted a hot line counseling service number more than once so I asked him to restate it for us here.
If you can find a therapist to talk to yourself as sexual abuse is an issue that really upsets our personal lives in so many ways.
I dont have a quick solution at all but what has helped me is to have meditations where I visualize my small child self and speak to her kindly explaining she is not at fault and sending kind understanding conversations within.
I do find I have an overwhelming vicious attitude toward people in the news who abuse animals and children so I guess it's a way to channel rage and helpless feelings.
 
@Honeeecombs,
Thanks for reaching out. I found a really got site that helped me in the past with ptsd stuff too. Www.rainn.org. Don’t know if you’ve checked it out before. Hope it helps. For guys there is a really good book called: abused as boys. Nice a resource is available for both men and women of all ages. Doesn’t take it away but certainly helps with healing.

Hope this helps and glad you are here. This is a safe place with caring people.

Jim in MD
 
Thank you MayMay and Jim - its embarassing to talk about but i learned in rehab that its something I have to do to get through it.

Thank you for the resources - i will definitely check out that website and book. I need to find some good coping mechanisms to hopefully cure my enuresis. To give you a little background, i struggled with Bedwetting till middle school due to the abuse - which when it came back in my mid 20s; threw my entire life upside down. I became bitter, saddened, i stopped hanging out with friends, i cut my hours at work to the point where i lost a couple jobs. Finally, my parents from the grace of god stepped in and got me motivated again and helped me through it. I sought therapy, i did urodynamic tests with the urologists, i tried different remedies until i finally just gave up and and went back to hiding disposable underwear in my closet.

Ive come a long way in two years - but these dreams and flashbacks scare the shit out of me. There's nothing more triggering that getting over stressed and then having to use the bathroom over 15 times in one day. Luckily, the medication Oxybutynin works for that.

Its nice to know I'm not alone.
 
@Honeeecombs Awesome and strong of you to open up here. That's brave and shows that you are a strong person, who though has episodes of PTSD is working to better yourself and improve you situation.

This is a great place to get great advise and support for all sorts of situation that we find our selves in. Someone mentioned in another post that if it has happened to you there is a high change that it has happened to someone else here and they are here to help.

Not knowing anything about PTSD I don't have any direct advise to pass on. But I will say we are here to listen and help you through it at any time no matter the situation.

Take care,

JT
 
@Maymay941 ‘s advice has also worked for me: “what has helped me is to have meditations where I visualize my small child self and speak to her kindly explaining she is not at fault and sending kind understanding conversations within.“ It’s one of the most important tools I’ve acquired to deal with never having been perfect enough for my parents, and their ensuing abuse and judgment.
 
I have found, in my case, that the kindness meditations to my small child self are not an instant fix but practiced with an effort as a daily exercise help more quickly than any talk therapy I've done. It doesn't cure me but it eases the flash backs. Incredibly, its hard to clear time and space to do this, more appealing to make excuses and be too busy.
My family dynamic was also very critical and I did not feel or hear that my claims for abuse were given action or acknowledged by my parents. Instead they became silent toward me in general and made efforts to change the subject or shuttle me off from the home to camp or college or what have you as if I was a walking faux as, afamily member who was an embarrassment might say something inappropriate.
I think someone listening and acknowledging abuse, stating what steps are being taken to protect the victim or confront the perpetrators would have been a great help at that time. Just listen, acknowledge without shaming and remove the child from the threat would be enough.
But now it's just me alone with the triggers and behaviors and life choices stemming from that long ago time. I've made choices out of my life experience and live with the choices. So be it. That's the human condition.

I should add my incontinence is not related in my case to abuse, it was a bad fall that injured my lower spine and hip.
 
@Maymay941 Me too: my incontinence has nothing to do with the emotional and verbal abuse I experienced from both parents, and is instead a result of falling.
 
@Maymay941 Indeed! I had such high hopes for a better decade to start in 2020 but then COVID arrived. At least I haven’t had any new diagnoses since January! I would love to go for five years with no new problems!
 
It has definitely been an unusual year so far. Thankfully wet re making it through the best we can and looking for the good that comes our way.

Anyone work in IT that can help us reset 2020 or should we just turn it off, count to ten, and try a reboot?
 
Jaytee said:
It has definitely been an unusual year so far. Thankfully wet re making it through the best we can and looking for the good that comes our way.

Anyone work in IT that can help us reset 2020 or should we just turn it off, count to ten, and try a reboot?
Click to expand...

"In regards to your 2020 issues - have you tried restarting the PC?" Hahaha every IT tech ever.
 
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