Tired of the stigma

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I was in a reflective mood a few days ago and got to thinking...

I received my hearing aides back from the shop after falling into a stream fishing and frying them. I was so grateful to have them again and hear all that I had been missing for the last month. Thinking about it made me wonder why I am so accepting of wearing hearing aides and glasses but still worry about the stigma attached with wearing diapers.
I am not going to go scream from the top of the hill that I wear diapers but at the same time I am tired of hiding the fact I need to wear them and worry about others finding out.

Society these days are a lot more accepting of just about everything yet a lot of us live in quasi fear of others finding out we have to wear some form of protection.

 

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I agree.

 

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Yes and no - it's not sexy to wear hearing aids! (I have two)

 

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First off, and most important, did you catch anything and second, what brand do you wear and what do you like/ not like about them. Im mot going to respond to your diaper concerns because if youre wearing them then you are alive

 

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I look at it this way diapers are a tool just like glasses and hearing aids when people make fun of me I laugh at them because send out with my buddies they got to go to the bathroom all the time and I offer him one of my diapers and the school has always called for eyes and my come back was four eyes are better than two we all have medical issues but you have to find sense of humor in it I've been called a smartass and I told people I rather be a smart one dumb one

 

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There you go! @Diaperedtman1988. It is better to be a smart ass than a dumb one!

 

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I couldn't agree with this more. There is definitely an unfair stigma that comes with wearing diapers.

I can relate because as a bedwetter, I've run into this problem. And it amazes me. Because whenever I disclose my bedwetting to anybody, its met with understanding. But as soon as I follow up by saying I wear diapers at night to manage my issue...thats when eyebrows raise and all of a sudden its like I'm a creep.

 

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So true, you try to explain your medical condition and all of a sudden they're omg Too much information,and like adam said they look all weird at you. We're human, ever person has their own medical issues and we try to deal with them in the best way possible!

 

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That’s understandable and I think we’ve all been there. I cannot offer you a way however once I decided this is a medical condition, out of my control, I began to relax about wearing diapers. Now I have no reservations or stresses regarding them or if someone should find out. I have many that have seen or found out since then and discovered my fears were basically self imposed.

 

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First off, and most important, did you catch anything and second, what brand do you wear and what do you like/ not like about them. Im mot going to respond to your diaper concerns because if youre wearing them then you are alive

I got a few bite but did not land anything, still had a great time. As for my hearing aides I have Oticon Minirite's and love them. Never realized how much I have been missing out on. Guess 4 years in the Marine Corps as infantry and 2- plus as a rangemaster for my Dept have taken their toll.

 

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So much of the stigma is our own reaction to it, but it's so hard to turn that off.

For me, I go back and forth between a "who cares" attitude about others finding out, and being terrified that others will notice. I don't know why my own attitude shifts like that, but it's probably tied up on my mental state.

Yesterday evening I was wondering on a big piece of machinery with a co-worker. I was kneeling on top of a gearcase, drilling a hole in a steel overhead beam, and I suddenly realized that I didn't know whether my shirt had come untucked in the back and was showing off the waistband of my diaper. My coworker never said anything, and he's not the sort that would spread rumors or gossip about me (we're pretty good friend outside of work) but I'm still terrified that he might have realized that I have incontinence problems. (I still don't know if there was anything to see - I had gloves on so I couldn't tell if my shirt was untucked, but I did stop and tuck it in better.)

On the other hand, he's someone that I feel like I can talk to about my other problems, whether it's work related, health, marriage, or whatever. He knows I have interstitial cystitis because we've talked about it. So why am I so scared that he might realize that I have leakage issues because of it, or they I need to wear something absorbent to deal with that?

I don't know, but it feels like most of the stigma is what I put into it. I doubt my friend cares.

 

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@MarineJohn. I wouldnt worry about being self conscious about havinh urine soaked diapers as long as you fall while fishing! That way your cover isnt blown...just blame it on the fall. Thanks for hearing aid info.

 

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Just a hitch hike thought here. Duluth Trading company has extra long tails for shirts.

 

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Thank you for your post MarineJohn. We at NAFC wholeheartedly agree! Incontinence is a medical condition just like anything else and deserves to be treated as such. So many people wait years before even talking to a doctor about it and getting the treatment that they deserve, which is a shame really because in many cases there are various treatments that can make a big difference.

If you're interested, our new campaign is launching today, which is all about speaking out about incontinence. There is also a free download with brochures and helpful tools to help you feel more comfortable talking about bladder leaks. Check it out and if you all don't follow us on Facebook, Instagram or Twitter, please do! For anyone who doesn't know, November is National Bladder Health Awareness Month and we'll be sharing posts all month long around the campaign and getting people to speak up (especially to their doctor)!

New Campaign on NAFC: www.nafc.org/noleaks


Thanks so much for your wonderful openness and for sharing!

NAFC

 

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I don't personally care, but I don't tell people, either, if I don't have to. However, I have a recurring dream in which I, for some reason, decide it's okay to go out in public wearing only a disposable brief. Inevitably, before the dream is far along, I realize that it's really NOT okay. (Closest I've come to having a genuine nightmare, for as long as I've been alive...)

 

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@jeffsweet, that makes perfect sense to not tell people if you don't have to. I don't either. With that dream you have a lot of people have similar dreams of going out in public in just their underwear and then for them it becomes a big deal. In other words they realizer it's not okay to venture out in just underwear. A disposable brief is the same as underwear. So you're having a dream that many people have about going out in their underwear and your underwear dream is a disposable brief. And as part of that underwear dream you realize it's not okay to go out wearing just a disposable brief. I think that's just human nature!

 

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I have had dreams of wearing my diapers and plastic pants in public and to work. Nobody noticed or made comments. This dream or nightmare has happened several times

 

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I don’t broadcast it but have no concern about it either. I initially worried about daytime use but found out, just like I discovered years ago with my nightime diapers for bedwetting, no one really cares. I’ve had a few share concern about how it affects me but no negative reactions or ridicule. We tend to worry way too much about an issue that isn’t really important to others.
I worried the first time I wore to my doctor but even then my doctor simply asked if I wore due to my neurogenic bladder. He, like my urologist, suggested surgery to possibly help. That’s not an option I choose. Surgeries in my life (6) have all had large negative results, except for one.
Diapers are simply an easy way to control the issue.

 

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I've had problems almost my whole life but when I had been dry a few yrs and then when older had to return sure hit the male ego my wife is the only one for sure that knows still hard to deal with.

 

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I think @Donny4 really hit it on the head when he said that we tend to worry about an issue that isn't all that important to anyone else. That's where the stigma comes from. It's something that is manufactured in our minds and results in overactive imaginations at times. It's okay if people are concerned about how it affects you, if they do it because they really care about you. But as you get older, people who actually make fun of it are few and far between. But after all, they are the ones with a problem, not you. That's because you are taking care of your issues in the way the suits you best!