Dealing with total bowel and bladder incontinence

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Thank you all for understanding and sharing your stories and advice. I've been dealing with depression and axiety for quite a long time and i'm not sure it's totally as a result of the situationi'm in. and there are times where I kind of feel really alone despite the fact that I know there are other people suffering the same thing. Here I am at 3am psyching myself up for a doctors appointment I have 5 hours away....
It is just very difficult to always be okay about things and for me it's just even more than usual. I'm all up for exploring all my options and everything but it's what I have been doing for so long and my parents have been trying since I was small. And for the past 2 years I've been really tired of everything. and I do have these temporary periods of really bad depression. sorry if I keep repeating myself but i mean i'm not doing well....my relationship with my girlfriend is so great and honestly it's not that she's uncomfortable with talking to me about it, i'm just really insecure about talking about it because for some screwed up reason I feel less of a person because of my incontinence. At the moment she is visiting her family and i'm kind of alone with this issue. but at least my time spent with her i haven't been totally depressed and i'm happy those times. it's just the more negative thoughts are always at the back of my mind no matter how much i distract myself. and I know these are feelings are something I should acknowledge but it's easier said than done.

I don't want to sound like i'm the only one with these problems or that i have no way out but sometimes my feelings do corner me into these thoughts. and I just want to let everyone know I am getting help, I guess it takes time and some hard work to get there.

@MezaJarJarBinks That is something I have discussed with my doctor before but due to past surgeries i've had it doesn't seem to be very promising, things are a little complicated down there unfortunately.

@Squander thanks a lot for the advice, and yes I've gotten advice from evrybody here so a big thanks, sorry if I seem like I can only complain, I guess i'm not going through the best of times, things will improve I hope.

 

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Do let us know how your appointment goes, good luck, Phil

 

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Andy, you are always welcome to vent here!

 

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Keep your chin up buddy incontinence is nothing to worry about

 

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I'm trying to edit my post but it ain't letting me but keep your chin up now I'm struggling with the thing myself becoming more and more incontinent I know it's frustrating I can tell me a good diaper but I have to worry about leaks now now that I know it's hard to accept it but I have to start wearing diapers at 22 my incontinence has just got worse at the age 31 where I started pooping myself how old are you buddy

 

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Thanks........just today before I got home I had a pretty bad bowel accident and once I got home i could tell the brief was really soiled. It had come all the way to the front of the brief and i'm really worried about infection.......I had to clean the bathtub while cleaning up as well because there was so much....and I couldn't stop crying while cleaning up. I was already dealing with depression since I was in school and even while incontinence isn't the worst thing to deal with in the world it's so socially and emotionally cripling. I ended up washing and scrubbing several times, I really struggle with it at times. I wake up in a soiled and wet brief....i start the day with a shitty mood already. really doesn't help with self confindence. And it's not that i'm not kind to myself it's that my body has betrayed me and i fight so hard to be okay with it.

I really do understand @andy_r. I've been through almost the same experiences and I do understand that it is really difficult. First few years of college it was very tough for me too as I too have suffered from bowel and bladder incontinence since I was in school. But I pushed through, graduated and now going for a masters, things are still hard, and I still do go through the same issues you're going through sometimes. Getting help from the people around you and using all possible rescources you have can help you a lot, there's nothing you have to be embarassed about or explain.

Lucklily for me as a girl I have a lot of options regarding clothes and I can sympathize with you for your limited options, but even when I had issues with being discreet people haven't had any bad reactions, sometimes we imagine the worst but that really isn't the case. I just want to let you know that you're not alone, being our age it can be a difficult medical issue to deal with, but things really do get better as you experience more and learn better and easier ways of managing it.

Please feel free to ask any quetions through the forum or even personally and I will try my best to help and everybody here will too. You have reached out, that's already a good step.

 

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Guess like others, I have both, and it gets really hard sometimes, and there are times I just need to sort out how good I really have it, and maybe some good meds to help you accept. My PCP did that for me, and it has helped. Hang in there lots of us here understand