when out and about with bowel issues

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Hey guys, haven't been on for a long time.
I'm finding it really hard to get out recently, I have not really had any sucess in cleaning up and changing when out of the house in the past, and with it being just me for the last few months it's been even more difficult because before I was out most of the time with my gf and whenever I needed to change I would just tell her that I need to get home whenever we can and I feel terrible for doing this but we have already discussed it and she insists that it's okay. And I understand because it's really the best that I do clean up and change as fast as possible.

little unrelated but i feel so freaking lucky to have met her and I don't want to come of as if I don't realize that but that doesn't really change my situation, just makes it a lot easier and I feel less alone.

Now i'm just staying home and I justify this by the fact that I don't have to make plans and cancel on people so often, it honestly happens so much. I just i really want to figure out how to change by myself if i'm outside. and I'm dreading when classes start the coming fall, and i'm constantly thinking if I can even do a part time job with this constant issue.

something not really a big issue at least in terms of practicality is that evry time I have tried more discreet briefs it's always ended up really badly, having to change constantly and always ending up with some leak and i'm kind of disgusted at how wet/filled the confidry's become but it feels a lot secure, and at the same time it feels so restrictive to be in it literally all the time, the only time in my 21 years existance that i was free of it was when I sat on the toilet for almost the entire day feeling like shit.....damn
sorry for the long post, but just wondering if anyone has any ideas.

 

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I feel your pain, I really do. It is very difficult to manage and there is simply no easy way to do it. When I leave the house I wear a full diaper with plastic pants over the top. I take nullo for odor and it helps quite a bit. Doing this will help you to at least make an escape without being noticed most of the time.

Changing on the go is much harder. For me, I have IBS pretty bad, so if if I have a full accident I will usually just go home. I do know places locally such as the mall, library, and other places that have single locking bathrooms. But it’s still not easy to do because you have to keep your clothes clean while changing, keep the floor clean, use a million wipes, dispose of all the evidence and put on a clean diaper. After all of that I still always feel gross, and am very paranoid about smell.

So usually if I have an accident while out I just do like you and go home and shower. I work part time in an office job, so I have quick access to a bathroom, so accidents are rare for me there. Plus my employer knows I have to go quickly.

It’s an awful thing that’s for sure, and I’m always hoping for a cure or relief. My therapist was trying to help me figure out ways to deal with accidents better, but ultimately we kind of came to the agreement that if you soil yourself in a public place sometimes there is just no easy way to deal with it. It’s just a cross we have to bear for now.

 

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Hey Andy I know this is embarrassing and whatnot but I try and find humor I deal with bowel incontinence myself and I riding in truck all day for work and when I fart my boss man ask me if I shit myself he has to turn off a dirt road get out of the truck and sit there for a minute outside for some reason the mega Max diapers holding the smell of the diaper until I sit I just got that nolu its help in credibly quite a bit with the smell

 

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i wear pullups. i often get no results sitting at home before i leave for work. it happens on my way to work walking or on the train. i guess i’m lucky that i don’t have huge problems when i do. it has been suggested to clean yourself out with an enema. for me i can’t do that at home since i keep my incontinence as secret (sort of) from my family and i don’t like that ordeal. either way i supppose its pretty bad but i rarely have bad problems with the pullup holding until i get to work. i have a secure place to clean up at work and a good system for doing it. i use a deodorant and i think i do not have odor once at my desk at work. i think some cases are manageable. of course i only know me. i have had some very bad accidents too. but for the most part, i am managing. i think i’ve posted how i take care of things but if you would like to know any specifics please feel free to ask. again, maybe i just don’t have such a severe problem but to me its pretty awful. and oh yes, my worst mess which was very bad i attribute to my own carelessness when rushing while putting the pull up on. great care works. i think.

 

[Archives1]

I feel your pain, I really do. It is very difficult to manage and there is simply no easy way to do it. When I leave the house I wear a full diaper with plastic pants over the top. I take nullo for odor and it helps quite a bit. Doing this will help you to at least make an escape without being noticed most of the time.

Changing on the go is much harder. For me, I have IBS pretty bad, so if if I have a full accident I will usually just go home. I do know places locally such as the mall, library, and other places that have single locking bathrooms. But it’s still not easy to do because you have to keep your clothes clean while changing, keep the floor clean, use a million wipes, dispose of all the evidence and put on a clean diaper. After all of that I still always feel gross, and am very paranoid about smell.

So usually if I have an accident while out I just do like you and go home and shower. I work part time in an office job, so I have quick access to a bathroom, so accidents are rare for me there. Plus my employer knows I have to go quickly.

It’s an awful thing that’s for sure, and I’m always hoping for a cure or relief. My therapist was trying to help me figure out ways to deal with accidents better, but ultimately we kind of came to the agreement that if you soil yourself in a public place sometimes there is just no easy way to deal with it. It’s just a cross we have to bear for now.

yeah i get what you mean, i'm so paranoid about the smell too,
I don't knkow but it's so difficult that it feels like there has to be something easier, i guess i've never really wanted to accept anything......
i end up having a shower every time i change, there's really no other way for me, and i just always end up having like full on accidents and the fact that my bladder is on overdrive doesn't help either. I've discussed so many options with my doctor over the years and tried so many different things and it has come to a point where it's more about managing it now and I still cannot get my head around that.
it's just so exausting dealing with the practicality of it.
the bulk, the fact that 24/7 it's just wearing briefs going through a few a day long drives are predictably do not go well, every time i've sat through a movie i've had to walk out....waking up soiled and wet, it's so exausting, but what more can i do i guess.

 

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Do me a favor Andy get on YouTube and look up now mountains by Lonestar

 

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I'm sorry to hear that things aren't really going well at the moment, I know it is really hard to see any of this in a positive light, because it cannot be seen that way.
When I read what you're going through and how you feel it's as if I'm reading something I would have said when I was in my first few years of college.
I have a mobility issue as well so that made it equally impossible to clean up when I was out. But despite this I took a lot of time and cleaned up as well as I could because I really couldn't be going up and down from uni to my apartment.
As a girl I had a lot of concerns about UTI's and rightfully so because it's something which has already happened several times. After a few years though it bacame easier when I came up with a good routine for when I did have to deal with it when I was not home.
It's so nice that you have a significant other who is with you through this and from what you've mentioned she seems understanding and I would not hesitate to trust her if you need to talk or just help in general.
So far for me I have not found many close friends and there have been instances where people found out about my issue and avoided me, which is great cause I don't need to associate with people like that.

Take things slowly and try and use all the help you can gets because that's okay.

 

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Would it be helpful to keep a journal for a week noting what you ate at what and then when your bowels eliminated. Then look for timing so you can see if the is a pattern to expect your need to sit patiently in a toilet and wait.
Obviously certain types of food like deep fried. Salad or meat are going to produce different urgency.
Im thinking getting to know your body's patterns, not fighting but listening can only be useful tool whhile you are in this less distracted social time

 

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I have but it has never really been consistant at all, except for maybe night time,

 

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I get that!
The only thing i know is certain fatty food like nuts or avocados cause reaction in an hour