Urge incontinence

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Hi my name is Mark. I’m in my 40s. I’ve dealt with some form of incontinence most my life urge incontinence is what I have. I have often thought the idea of wearing protection. But now I’m at a point where it’s just what makes sense after a few embarrassing incidents. I’d love to talk to others it might deal with similar. Hope everybody’s having a beautiful day

 

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Hi Mark,
Welcome to the forum. This is a great place to find resources and advice for exactly what you’ve described. I’m in a similar boat as you. I’ve had bed wetting all my life and dealing with day time urge incontinence for the last couple years. Know that you’re not alone and that with time it gets to be a new normal. Live life to the fullest and don’t worry about it.

All the best, Jetskier

 

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What Jetskier said. It’s more common than you imagine. The real challenge is controlling it rather than letting it control you. You seem to be heading in that direction.

 

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I really appreciate that guys. It seems I am finding out it’s more common than most realize. What do you find helps protect best and can be discreet

 

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Depends,pads,chucks. Etc... there are numerous products out there. Unfortunately it's a little trial and error to find what works best fir you. Myself I use TENNA medium absorbancy mens pad. As for the bed you can get liquid proof mattress covers. Sheets can be washed.

 

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Each person’s needs will be different based on how much is voided and how often accidents occur. In my case I use Seni tape on briefs in a range of absorbencies for day time issues and I’ll use Confidry 24/7 briefs at night.

Good rule of thumb is to make sure you’ve seen a doctor and that you don’t have a condition that could negatively affect your health. In my case urge incontinence doesn’t have a good fix that would avoid me becoming a science experiment, and I’m in otherwise perfect health. So I just manage it and go on with life.

 

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I am in same position as you and Jetskoer too. Lifelong bedwetting and worn nappies at night all my life. Medication has never really helped and investigations showed I have smaller bladder capacity than normal for a 6 foot man. I’ve also had spinal injury with prolapsed discs then surgery and that’s affected my nerves and I have a lack of sensation at times of my bladder. For nights at home I use cloth nappies and waterproof pants - more absorbant, more comfortable and more eco friendly. If away I use the best disposables I can which tor me are Tenaslip Ultima tape on nappies.
My daytime urge issues are ok of at home, work or in places where I know where loos are and can have eay and regular access. However there are times when traveling such as on public transport (buses and London tubes have no toilets) or doing things where I know I can’t find a toilet quickly that I choose to wear a nappy in the day. Again I find Tena good and use a slightly thinner version. I don’t particularly like the pull up pants as they are less absorbant and as I’m very skinny in hip and bum area they always seem too loose. Plus to change in a public loo you need to remove footwear and trousers whereas a tape on nappy can be changed standing up with trousers just lowered. I’ve lived like this for years and never felt anyone had noticed and I’m
far less self conscious about it all than I used to be. Been into hospital for surgery or investigations (non bladder related) and told nurses that I need protection and they never bat an eyelid. My wife understands and is supportive and I really now don’t care what people think. I wear glasses to see properly and nappies because my bladder misbehaves. Rather that than have embarrassing accidents that all will see

 

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@Mark1979 Hi Mark. You've come to the right place. We have all been there...and some of us have never left. People in this forum are full of great information and suggestions, so don't be shy with questions. As for me, at eight months post laparoscopic prostate removal surgery I find that my incontinence becomes more and more manageable with time. At this stage, my leakage is minimal. Still I am never without supports because the leakage can get heavier unexpectedly. I use Depends briefs during the day. They are very discreet and comfortable, and absorbency is quite good. At bedtime, I will usually switch to Depends' Night Defense. It has a heavier pad with excellent absorbency. I also put a bed pad on top of my sheet for safe measure. I almost never wake up to any wetness at all. There are plenty of good pads as well; however, I stopped using them after a while because I found that they started chafing the head of my penis, making it sore to the touch.

 

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Welcome Marc! Yeah for me I have a few episodes each day usually small but have been larger to the point where I would have anxiety wearing only a pad that it would leak and be visible to people, so I recently switched to pull-ups with a pad inside that I can throw away to not go through as many pull-ups since they are more expensive. But this gives me peace of mind knowing I am protected if I have a bigger accident.

 

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I was a bed wetter till age 12 and going back to diapers was easy as I was a EMT for around 40 years and knew just how many adults wore diapers
I wear a light grade diaper during the day if i am staying at home and have a hospital urine bottle within reach. At night, I wear either a magamax or XP5000 and don't get up 4 to 5 times a night, I just relax and let it flow. Many times when my back goes out i have to use a homemade rope ladder just to raise up from laying flat to standing and its very painful. Not something you want to-do 4 or 5 times a night, If i am going out for the day I wear the XP5000 and do not worry about changing.