Psychological

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So i havnt been on here for ages still got nighttime problems. I think some of you might think im some weirdo and i shouldn't be on here and if that's the case I'll go. I dont have a physical medical condition to cause bedwetting, i have cptsd and eupd. I wear diapers(slips) at night as sometimes i wet myself and its psychological. It sounds really bad i know for you that have a problem that you cant physically help but i can but i don't. Sometimes i don't bother going to the toillet before bed knowing im more likely to wet. I wet deliberately and i really dont know why apart from i feel safe if im wearing diapers and when i don't wear them sonetimes i wet the bed anyway even though i know i will regret it in the morning with the coldness and having to wash the bedding. Its like i cant reason with myself to stop theres been some days when ive said its out of controll and i have to stop so i stop wearing the dipers but then i wake in the night or i go to bed thinking i really need to wet the bed. And its like an argument in my head whether I should or not. I am not well right now, having vivid flashbacks, waiting for therapy over several traumatic experiences im very highly anxious but i dont have a physical problem that stops me from realising i need the toilet. Hate me if you want i dont think i could feel any worse right now anyway

 

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Hi Teddy here,you are not a weirdo,we all have problems,some are worst than others,this site is to help one another,some will give more advice than others and when I read the problems of others I count myself lucky.Don't think of yourself as a weirdo,you are still a survivor,take care

 

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Hi Alana, We've missed you and have been wondering how you've been! I'm glad you're back and please know you have other friends here who want to hear from you as well! But please, please, please don't think you're weird or that you shouldn't be here. And definitely do not for even one minute entertain the idea that you should go!!!! Do continue to seek out therapy and just don't give up on that. You do need a professional to talk to and that is okay. We all have times when we really need some sort of outside help and there is no shame in admitting that.
And if those flashbacks continue to bother you then keep pressing to talk to someone who can help. You have the right to do what you need to do to feel whole and healthy again and you definitely should!! If one avenue doesn't pan out then we'll find another one to try. Please consider talking to your regular doctor and maybe a nurse at your clinic and those people can suggest other places to try. That's their job and that's what they are trained to do.
I also think it's a priority to do what makes you most comfortable in dealing with this. If going the diapers route is what you're most comfortable with and if it results in the least amount of inconvenience then that's fine. You are number one and you need to take care of yourself and you have only yourself to answer to!
And there is no way any of us can ever hate you. After all you are a perfectly good and functioning human who deserves some good help along with the friendly ears and the helping hands right here to give you the boost that you need. We are here for you!!! Please come when you want. We are open 24/7!!!

 

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Hi Alana,

Welcome back. You are not weird at all. You are in the right place here among others who wear diapers for whatever reason. I am not sure whether I told you but I was abused in my first school toilets and as a result, I cannot go to the toilet in a public toilet, the fear prevents me from being able to go and the stigma is still with me, some 45 years later.

As Bill says, try and get some psychological help and starting at your GP is a good start. A psychologist can help you get through your mental fight and you don't have to suffer alone.

 

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@laalaauk @billliveshere @Teddy2834 thanks guys. Ive got a telephone appoitment with my docter tomorrow shes been trying to chase up therapy for me for a while but the service that provides mental health care where i live says they wont offer me counselling due to me being high risk of suicide/self harm despite me saying i wouldnt take my life because i have children. The service is going to discharge me after me being on their waiting list for 18months with no help and have told me to try a charity for counselling. I feel the only way to get the help i need would be to end up in hospital. @laalaauk i totally understand the public toilets thing as i avoid them too something happened when i was 14 at a unisex swimming changing rooms by my cousin who was 24 at the time so the whole cubical small space locked door freaks me out.

 

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Hi Alana, I'm glad you're going to talk to your doctor tomorrow so you can refresh her on what you need. Please try to get from the doctor at least a name and contact number (several numbers if possible) for someone who can help. But it's kind of strange the service you've tried can't provide help because they think you're at a high risk for suicide or self-harm. Isn't that what a mental health service is supposed to do????? I would think they would prioritize those who are at the highest risk and get you to treatment. And then do what they need to do for prevention. I would think they would want to get right on it and send you to get help immediately!!!
Please tell the doctor you are being haunted by those flashbacks as they seem to be keeping you from living a normal life and that you want to work on getting rid of them for once and for all. The wetting seems to be a manifestation of the flashback and you definitely want that to stop. But if going to the hospital turns out to be the most viable option, then that is something to explore. You do need the doctor's help to do what is best for you.
I wish you the very best when you talk to your doctor and please know that we are all here to listen to you and to reach out and help you face this.

 

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Dear Alana, Please complain to your GP about the healthcare company who told you to go to a charity for help. I am sick to death hearing rubbish responses like this and as a student nurse, this is not the way we are being trained to work with patients at all. Please tell your GP that you don't have any intention to self harm or commit suicide and tell them you are desperate for help. I am so sorry you have been let down by the NHS.

Thank you for understanding how I feel when I have to go in a cubicle in a service station or such like and I want you to know that I have been where you are, before and if doctors would have taken more notice of my pleas for help, they would not have had to have sewn my left wrist back up again. I don't want this for you. Do you think you are depressed at all? If so, the doctor might be able to put you on a tablet to lighten your mood. My next door neighbour was like this and was prescribed Citalopram and he says he feels like a new man again. It is worth a try?

Best regards,

Darren.

 

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Speaking from a therapist point of view, bedwetting often occurs in response to sexual trauma. a lot of the time (consciously, or unconsciously), the individual will start wetting during the day or night. It is an attempt at safety. If they are wet and smell of urine, or in a wet diaper, a person is less attractive sexually, and it may fend off potential violators. I see it all the time in families i work with. I am not sure if your experience is similar, but thought it was with mentioning.

 

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@Mightychi i was sexually abused raped and made to do things i didn't want from the age of 14 to 21. Then the trauma of that, that i,d shoved to the back of my mind repeated when i got stuck in an abusive relationship for 6 years. I escaped 2 years ago but still face my fear every 2 weeks to hand my younger 2 children over for contact. I dont think its the thought that it will keep people away but it is a safety thing. Diapers are comfy and safe sometimes i feel like a child even though im a 38yr old mother of 5children with qualifications and probably more mature than alot of people i know (apart from Diapers). I struggle with life daily i struggle to make desisions i like people to help me to take pressure away i suppose i like to be looked after as if i was alot younger. My childhood was a seen and not herd type.