Just broke down crying. I can’t anymore

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I’m turning 36 soon and I never thought I would be dealing with stress incontinence at my age. I’ve had three kids so I know my pelvic floor is weak. I dread getting a cold or sick to where I’m throwing up. I dread sneezing or having belly laughs. This has now gotten so bad that it’s really affecting my quality of life. I started a new job and I happen to be sick with a bad cough. I was late today, because right before I got off the car I had a coughing fit and wet myself. I’m constantly worried and stressed that it’ll happen in public and/or that I smell like urine. I broke down crying because I don’t know what else to do. I’ve tried kegels but it hasn’t worked for me. I know I need to lose weight but I need a solution NOW. I don’t have insurance so I can’t see or afford a doctor. Has anyone used any devices that helped with this? I’ve seen ads for innovo, but I don’t want to drop 500 dollars for something that won’t help. Thank you in advance for any advice you can give.

 

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Since you can’t afford insurance, or medical care, be sure to use protection which will contain the urine until you can change it. Sending you my best wishes. We’re all in this together in one way or another.

 

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I agree with Pbk. Also, if you can carry a change of clothes, that would help. I saw a button with a great quote: Squeeze before you sneeze. Do you wet yourself or leak? You could just carry pads and wipes. I don’t leak, I wet. And I wear pull ups and often leak anyway. I hope something here helped you. Hang in there

 

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It really depends how much “stress” I’m under. Sometimes it’s a small leak but like this morning no matter how hard I squeezed I fully wet myself.

 

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Ruth, you have a lot on your plate, it's natural to cry. Youve survived all the bad days right through today. You dont need to lose weight, you need to love self. Everything will fall into place. Now you go get some baby type or feminine hygiene type wipes and the women's incontience pads they sell in cvs and walmart. You KNOW when you see them in all sizes by a bunch of
Companies that ALOT of women need them, not just you. Get what you think will make you feel protected.
Then you plan on wearing clothes that dont clutch your crotch or maybe hang like a inch below. You do the things that make you laugh, you sneeze when you gotta sneeze and join the long line of women at the ladies room in every mall and movie theatre.
Get spare pants like the ones you are wearing, roll them into a neat sausage and a plastic bag to carry in your purse for any wetted clothes.
Be nice to Ruth, she is your closest friend, it is what it is sometimes.

 

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It's not your fault, your situation is much more common than you think...and there is help...and it's not your fault...it won't get better on its own...but there is help.

Understandably, first step is to regain control so you can get to work and seek care.

My company is happy to send out free samples to try out so you don't waste time and money finding something that works for you.

Just fill out our form at https://www.northshorecare.com/request-for-product

Ask for samples of 1410 and 1413 which are most common life-saver for your situation.

As soon as you're able to, try to get to a specialist who is trained in pelvic health and incontinence. See lists of specialists in your area at https://www.nafc.org/find-a-doctor

Wishing you all the best.

Sincerely,
Adam
NorthShore.com
Board Certified Patient Advocate

 

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I understand. I had three kids too. I’ve tried incontrol and I’ve tried Elitone. They both work because electrical stimulation tells your muscles to squeeze and it does it stronger. I can’t tell you if it will work for you but check out their return policies.

 

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Maymay has given you a very sweet "soft" reply so here is a tougher one. You have to help yourself as much as possible in this situation and in life in general. So, you have to continue seriously with the kegels and you have to lose weight. (Consider the extra pressure your weight is putting on your bladder). And of course, go with Maymay's practical suggestions. I'm trying to be helpful here.

 

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Try not to fret Ruth. You are not alone! My sister has been where you are. When she took control and started to manage the situation she started to feel much better about the situation. I am quite sure she wears a panty liner (for urine) daily, and if she has a cold or feels she may need more protection she steps up to a heavier pad. She still works on her pelvic floor strength, but the protection definitely gave her the confidence to keep living her life (much like managing a period).

 

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It's not your fault, your situation is much more common than you think...and there is help...and it's not your fault...it won't get better on its own...but there is help.

Understandably, first step is to regain control so you can get to work and seek care.

My company is happy to send out free samples to try out so you don't waste time and money finding something that works for you.

Just fill out our form at https://www.northshorecare.com/request-for-product

Ask for samples of 1410 and 1413 which are most common life-saver for your situation.

As soon as you're able to, try to get to a specialist who is trained in pelvic health and incontinence. See lists of specialists in your area at https://www.nafc.org/find-a-doctor

Wishing you all the best.

Sincerely,
Adam
NorthShore.com
Board Certified Patient Advocate

Adam, on behalf of the board thank you. I hope Ruth takes you up on your offer.

 

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Thanks everyone. I bought pads specifically for this and it has helped keep me dryer. I just feel so... not cute? Lol I’m not sure how to describe it. I’m going to try to get into the free medical clinic to try to see why I can’t shake this bad cough.

 

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Good for you Ruth!
Feeling so not cute can be related to a lot of things!
In case you need another dose of unsolicted advice, if you have concern about lingering pee smell i am using a deodorant called Lume that is wuite different, it is all natural and can be used in literally ever part of the body that you want under arms, belly folds under breasts and in the most private areas of private parts even the feet! This is something I order on line just google Lume deoderant.It is non irritating and not a cover up.