Embarrassed and can’t sleep due to adult bedwetting

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Hello,

I’m new to this forum. I’m a 23 year old female that has dealt with off and on bed wetting my whole life. When a teen, it definitely happened more due to stress. I would be so anxious about missing class I would hold it too long and leak, or it’s like my body just doesn’t tell me I need to pee and I’m always rushing. It always feels urgent when I need to go. As an adult it seems lowering my stress levels doesn’t fix it. I have dreams of using the bathroom and wake up to abnormally large amounts of pee, without fail. It’s too the point that I’m afraid to get the deep sleep I need because I’m scared if I sleep deeply I’ll pee. I can’t spend the night at people’s houses for the same reason (Peed at a friend’s house once when I was 16). I’m making myself sick not sleeping well/enough, but I’m tired of ruining sheets wetting the bed. I’m also tired of the anxiety that comes with this issue. Even limiting my fluid intake at night doesn’t work. Going pee before bed does not work…I don’t know what to do or why this happens to me.

 

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Hello Igloo,
the forum is a place you will meet many people with the sort of nocturnal incontinence and stress leaks you have and others with problems from injury or illness.

One solution recently posted that is inexpensive and can let you sleep better is to buy the inexpensive grocery store type disposable pul ups underwear in the feminine hygiene aisle and then a baby diaper which you cut the plastic back off and insert in the middle.

Of course there are disposable underwear which are available in much more variety of coverage and size that others who can remind you of. They advertise in the headline of NAFC
I have seen unopened packs of baby and even adult disposable underwear at thrift stores too.

The baby diaper is extremely absorbent and fits in the most needed place.

You might want sprinkle baking soda heavily on the mattress is your urine has leaked on the bed and put a waterproof mattress over on it. Lie on that a night or two to let the baking powder press in mattress then vacuum off the powder.

If you sleep at a friend's house bring a cloth pad protector )it's a small pad that lies in the mid section of the bed where you lie) and plastic bags me to securely bag the mattress protector .the other bag you bag up the used Disposable underwear and take to outside trash as discreetly as you can. Sorry I know it's not fun. But think of it as if you were disposing of menstrual pads and trying to do it politely.

For the day leaks due to stress you will find incontinence pads in the feminine care aisle. They are good for unexpectedly having a surge of pee in the day.
Remember that this is a common problem a even grocery stores carry a large quantity of the items so it tells you YOU ARE NOT UNIQUE OR ALONE.

 

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Welcome to the forum. You will find lots of support here. There are folks on this forum who have many different kinds of problems resulting in incontinence. I'm sorry this has affected your life so negatively and for such a long time. Coming here is a step towards a better adjustment. You didn't mention if you've seen a doctor for your issues -- people often avoid dealing with this medically out of embarrassment -- but avoidance doesn't help. If you haven't yet, you should see a urologist (find a female MD if you're more comfortable with that) and get evaluated as soon as possible. There may be medical issues you're not aware of which can be treated. If your choice of urologist doesn't seem to be understanding or helpful, find another one!
In the meantime, get some good incontinence pads (either disposable or washable-- try your local pharmacy and don't worry about what the staff there think) so that you can get some sleep without worrying about ruining the sheets. You can work with this problem if you tackle it head-on. We all have issues -- don't be afraid to talk about them here - and you'll see that things can get better if you look for solutions!

 

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Lok up in the forum home the list of threads

"My low cost effective and discreet routine" explained the over the counter inexpensive fix for night incontinence I was trying to explain

As I said you can even find baby diapers a half the store cost in a thrift store often and no embarrassment to purchase for you as a young woman

 

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I been there with that issue for a lot of years. The sleep deprivation wasn't worth it so eventually I started using night protection which for me, put me kind of at rock bottom on my self esteem but it kept beds dry.
I started setting my alarm recently to wake myself and it did end up helping greatly along with some other self help things i was doing.I'm cautiously optimistic that I've beat this problem over the past year but always fearful it could come back as my issue was driven more psychologically than physical.

My suggestion would be to continue to look for treatments/tricks, maybe medication that could help. There isn't a one cure fits all thing for a lot of us. It doesn't hurt to try different things. Keep up with this forum and there are many who will share different ideas.

 

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Welcome to this safe place.

I too have a problem with night time incontinence, but it is more intermittent than what you are experiencing. I also dream about using the toilet only to wake up after the fact and find a wet diaper. Sometimes the pad beneath is wet too, but it saves the bed, and minimizes the clean up.

As Slawrence suggested, if you haven't seen a doctor about this issue, it is really important that you do so to make sure there isn't a more serious underlying medical condition that is causing your incontinencde. From there, you and your doctor can try different things to get this under control.

In my case, after many different types of tests, my issue is mostly psychological and is triggered by stress, so when my work life gets really stressful, I wear a diaper every night to bed. As my father was dying of cancer and then my brother-in-law 8 months later, I was wearing a diaper every night. At other times, when I am not feeling a lot of stress, I often sleep without a diaper and get through the night without incident.

My advice is to learn more about your condition and then take control. Don't let incontinence schedule your life.

Chris

 

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Welcome to this amazing home and I hope you can get some medical help soon.

 

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Hello Igloo;

Welcome to the NAFC. I hope as others have shared - that you feel that you are not alone.

It was a long time for me to come to terms with OAB Syndrome, Urgency Incontinence and Nocturnal Enuresis.

Bladder problems are sometimes the worst; and continence problems in general can make us feel alone, isolated and in fear of what others may judge us for our condition.

But when when we own the condition and take matters into our own hands - we will find protection not just in our management products; but in strength for who we are regardless of that condition.

A woman told me last night "Release forgiveness for your inner weaknesses. Because God loves you and He has a plan for you. He does not see you different, because He created you.".

I don't know if you are spiritual but I had an experience last night with a doctor who helped me continue on my journey with God and healing under His Love. She understood all the pain that I have been going through the past couple of days in regards to things with my bladder issues and said she could see the pain in my eyes.

It was truly the first time in person a person other than my urologist; felt sympathy and offered validation for everything I (and we) go through.

If you feel that way; and you feel alone because of bladder issues; come on here. Frequent here and read the testimonies from others.

Don't be afraid to sometimes taking matters into your own hands and decide to do something about your continence issues until a treatment or successful procedure/cause is found. We all have been there. But you will find inner strength and peace in doing so.

If you have any questions about treatment options; or want to express your emotions or share and relate to others I've found safety in this community - as it is not only a record of my personal journey; but of memories good times and bad with good people I have met through the NAFC.

And when we share our feelings with others (especially Him) he credits it to our account. Don't be so hard on yourself - you are doing the right thing by sharing your story. In time and with inner healing; you may find your symptoms getting better.

Amen!

Blessings In Christ,
Honeeecombs

 

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Hi Igloo99,
Welcome to the forum. I feel your pain and can totally relate. I am a 26 year old female with nighttime incontinence almost every night. Like you, I have no idea it's happening until I wake up and I'm wet. What's different for me is that it started only a year ago. No idea why and my urologist can't figure it out. Lots of tests done and no physical reason yet. I am now seeing a neurologist to see if she can help. I believe mine may be at least partly anxiety related because it gets worse when I have stressful days.

It's frustrating and I get the embarassment but if you follow the great advice others here have provided, you can deal with it better and hopefully sleep better. Hopefully you also have people in your life who understand and support you. I just got engaged to my long time boyfriend and he isn't bothered by my incontinence. He's the best.

Please see a urologist and get tests done. I hope you can get some help soon. Meanwhile, you can use protection to help save yoir bed and clothes. Good luck and keep us posted.

 

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I was a bed wetter too still am.in my teens had to wear diapers or pull ups very embarrassing and parents not very accepting of it. Now as a adult I’m in diapers 24/7 I can’t control my bladder been to tons of doctors. But I can deal with this no need to feel embarrassed over it it happens to people as I found out most are very understanding

 

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Edit. This was posted in the wrong thread. Sorry. Was reading another thread and clucked in this ind to reply.

 

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Hi Igloo99,
Welcome to the forum. I feel your pain and can totally relate. I am a 26 year old female with nighttime incontinence almost every night. Like you, I have no idea it's happening until I wake up and I'm wet. What's different for me is that it started only a year ago. No idea why and my urologist can't figure it out. Lots of tests done and no physical reason yet. I am now seeing a neurologist to see if she can help. I believe mine may be at least partly anxiety related because it gets worse when I have stressful days.

It's frustrating and I get the embarassment but if you follow the great advice others here have provided, you can deal with it better and hopefully sleep better. Hopefully you also have people in your life who understand and support you. I just got engaged to my long time boyfriend and he isn't bothered by my incontinence. He's the best.

Please see a urologist and get tests done. I hope you can get some help soon. Meanwhile, you can use protection to help save yoir bed and clothes. Good luck and keep us posted.

I'm 26 too! Congratulations on your engagement.

 

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Thanks @ayam!

 

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@Jh2025 You're welcome!

 

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You are not alone, regardless of gender…