I'm losing control.. of my emotions

Honeeecombs I hope you are feeling much better today and can realize how strong of a person you are and the courage it takes just to even post on this forum and open up and spill your emotions. It is a great place to do such as this is a safe place without judgements. I am sorry you feel so alone. That’s a crappy place to be. Please know that many of us here care about you and are here for you. Rise above the depression clouds as otherwise they will suck you in. If you can’t rise above by yourself reach out here or in your home town seek professional help and maybe even get on an an antidepressant. As I have been down in the dumps and it took me awhile to get out of it and I still am taking antidepressants 3.5 years later however like my psychiatrist said with MS like I have sometimes the brain chemistry gets changed for life due to damage caused by the lesions resulting in some patients needing antidepressants basically for life after some very bad relapses. Not great news but considering they didn’t think I could talk after viewing by mri I think I am doing very well all things considered. I have done lots of counseling and needed to accept myself through and through and address numerous traumas that have occurred in my life.

I can truly say it’s gets better however it’s not easy and takes a lot of effort to change oneself to accept things as they are and make the most out of them. I need to wear diapers and judge me for that. Lol. I don’t care as honestly I need them for the convenience and protection they provide and you know what there is nothing wrong with that. And anyone who thinks there is I truly feel sorry for them because obviously they are not well internally aka mentally and they are not even aware of what I am saying.

We all need to slow down to the speed of life and learn to enjoy the small things in life.

I hope you are feeling much better today. With love ❤️
 
Does anyone think that a zoom conference call would be of help in this era of separation? I don't know much about zoom, but I can Google it and find out how to make it happen. I hate to see people unable to reach out at times of need and not be able to connect with someone. Thoughts?
 
Last thing at least for this moment

The suggestion of solarcain in rectum before a bm sounds like a good idea to try.
Also a stool softener in small pieces until you find the right dos pay attention to what different food does for constipation
in YOU i am myself reverse of the diet recommendations. a high fiber healthy brown rice and veggie diet binds, I thrive on McDonald's, fried food and Mexican food. But I pay attention and eat what works for me. Fig newtons are my go to, not prunes.
If they aren't planning surgery until October they don't seem too worried about the fissure, do they.
TAKE OWNERSHIP OF YOUR BODY.
 
Hi @jeffswet, a Zoom conference is a really interesting idea especially in this era of social distancing. I don't know much about Zoom and my worry is my computer is about 50 years old (or so it seems!) and have no idea if a Zoom set-up can even be incorporated into it. But boy, what a thought! :D Maybe that would be a way for us to feel less isolated and make connecting a bit easier all around. Knowing me, though, I'll probably clam up in front of the camera! :eek:
 
Hi Jeff this person has an 8ssue that his doctor suggested a scphinctorotomy as well as he is a bedwetter
 
First off, i want to apologize. I was having a really bad day yesterday. And im sorry for scaring anybody. I do need help.

Yes, the abuse and trauma is what contributes to my PTSD and my bedwetting. So I should go back to therapy for that. I tried therapy and it became too real, too fast and I quit cold turkey. That was two months ago.

To maymay941 and Jeff - I've been living with a fissure that has not healed for over 5 years now - that is why my gastrointerologist is recommending that procedure - that is something that is on my mind as well as I feel my opioid addiction that caused that back in college is somehow going to play a joke on me as I read that procedure *sphincteroctomy* can cause bowel incontinence. Trying not to think about it - could be all in my head.

To bill, thank you and again I am sorry I am scaring everybody. I didn't mean to. Sometimes this condition is too much to bear with COVID, isolation and no peers to chat amongst in real life.

But you are all right - there is support here. And sometimes I am ignorant to think that I am alone, but I am really not. So I am so so sorry for the trouble I may have caused anybody. I am just a 27 year old male who is feels scared of the future.

Thank you to everyone for the support - it really means alot from the bottom of my heart.
 
Understand this it rock bottom hits us all at different times in different ways for different triggers.
If therapy was going to hard to fast on you part of reclaiming that it's YOUR mind and body is to SAY SO and if that is not respected then you take yourself away. No one gets to push you where you don't want to go. You're the driver of this car.
 
Honeeecombs - Something that worked for my daughter might work for you. If you're interested I can give you the details.
 
I would try botox, Fibrovan/endovan, the ky with lidocaine and daily stool softener for up to 4 month. I think botox helped me aome but took a couple months, plus the fibrovan/endovan.

Not that the surgery wont help, its just that if it wasnt for surgery there would be surgical complications. When i told my doc i had chronic diarrhea and that it would contaminate the surgery site, his abswer was lomotil. Dumbass, lets work onbthe cause of the chronic diarrhea.
 
A fissure is what i had and its painful. Like i said, fibrovan and botox helped remove scar tissue and allow it to relaz and heal.
I was worried about incontinence
 
Hi Honeeecombs, I read you loud and clear! I can well appreciate how this damned Covid thing has affected everybody and how frightening the isolation and just the uncertainty of everything is. As a "baby boomer," I have never ever before seen anything like this and I hope we don't ever have to go through anything like this ever again! But I'm afraid I don't have the answers. So it's really easy to be scared of the future which is why we all need to keep ourselves as healthy as possible and just be alert. I have to admit I'm as scared of this as anybody. I also know how it is to have no one next door or just down the block to just drop in or call and talk to. But do remember this: you have us! And please don't think for one minute or even one second that you have to apologize for anything!!! Hey guess what, you're only human and what you're going through is a very human experience. And it's very human to offer help and a hand to reach for. I'd be a fool to tell you that there is nothing to fear for the future. We all do. But here is where you have an advantage: you have us right here on this forum to face the future with! You may send a PM to anyone and if you have these feelings at any time of day or night, then get the old keyboard out and type away! Someone will be there! (unless everybody is asleep! But someone will be awake soon).
Oh, and one more thing....let's revisit therapy. I can understand how it can get too intense and that you just want to walk away from it all. But let's just call up your therapist and get back up on that horse that threw you! Your therapist will understand and will welcome you back. Now giddy-up podner!!
 
@Honeeecombs Look at you dude. You had a crisis and were strong enough to share it here. I think cause you knew you'd get the support and words of encouragement that you needed at the time here. That is a sign of strength and of having control over your situation. That is awesome.

So man good people here ready for anything that comes their way. We got ya dude just like you have offered such good advice to others.

So when ever the times gets rough and you feeling in a critical state know that you will get support here. Keep working on building up your local support network too like your parents and other recourses you might have access to.

Bro, proud of you for being strong. Keep it up.

JT
 
How chronic bowel disease can affect your sex life is an article in menshealth.com article
As usual it popped up on my Facebook fed and I skimmed. Not very informative but the concept is:
"if they can't accept your story they can't accept you"
The issue was chrohns disease which has pain and diharrea, so.
Just another main stream article to say nafc is not the only place talking about the issues of bowels and continence and its impact on modern life and relationships.
 
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