Hoping for things to improve.

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Hey guys, back posting here after a long time.
Been okay but frustrated about how things turn out.
Like nothing has gotten batter overall with regards to the incontinence. I wanted things to be better and maybe just expected too much. It just sucks to not be able to do anything about it.

Even in the brief department I change from brand to brand expecting it to make things easier but obviously it doesn't change anything. I guess I don't know what else to say about this than its just really rough.

I know a lot of people go through similar circumstances, but I don't really personally know of anyone and that can feel isolating. Its just dealing with the total lack of both bowel and bladder control is crippling and it really does wear me down. Even after such a long time I don't know why I havent gotten used to it.

Anyway sorry for the negativity but its whats on my mind a lot so I really just want to vent 24/7.

 

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Sometimes you just need to vent. I can understand your frustration and feel for you.

 

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@christy4 Hi christy4, that's exactly how I felt before I found out about this forum. I have severe urinary incontinence from a spinal injury years ago and also go through intestinal flare ups every now and then, have involuntary bowel movements. At first, I felt angry at life and was always in a grumpy mood, but with tremendous suppport from my wife,I started managing it.
The doctor told me about incontinence products and tried the store brands but was not working for me in terms of absorbency. So I began my search online and saw retailers of incontinence products. I tried a couple of european brand diapers and they worked fantastic!.Ever since then, I have been able to go back to work, live a good life, not have to worry about changing every two hours with the store brands. I started using the Abena xplus and currently use BetterDry and can go anywhere and it feels good to have that freedom. Don't worry about negativity, I'm like that sometimes and
I come to the forum to ask, vent or just chat.

 

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Hi and welcome back. Agreed it is frustrating at times for sure.
Hope you find something in the forums that can help make life easier.

 

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Hi @christy4, I haven't met you on the forum yet since I've been here since the summer and understand that you were here quite a long time ago. Well I'm glad to meet you and you know that you are welcome here any time you have something on your mind or even just want to say "Hi!"
You may not personally know of anyone with serious incontinence but believe me there are a lot out there. And some of them may even include people you already know! So you definitely are not alone! After all you have us here! I think the best way to get used to it is to invest in your protection. I know it takes a lot of experimenting and finding brands and all of us have had to do that at one time or another. Please remember that what one brand works for one person may not work for the next person. It's just a matter of tweaking things and going to the wealth of distributors out there who can provide samples. In other words it's not one size fits all. We all have different bodies and different needs and you will ultimately find something that's perfect for you. After all we're only human! So please drop in any time!

 

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@christy4 What part of the country are you in? If you’re in SLC, UT by chance, I’d be happy to meet up in-person.

 

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Hey Christy, don't let this get you down. First off, there are plenty of other young people in the dating crowd who are in the same boat. I have learned to embrace this for what it is. I have other friends with similar circumstances and have dated many other girls in the same boat too. You are not alone! I used to get into a slump, but figured out some ways to embrace my situation and not let it hold me back. If you want to chat sometime, send me a message. I can give you some pointers.

 

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New guy on here. Listening to all of you gives me hope.

 

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Welcome and glad you are here.

 

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Thank you @Kentuckian. Giving people hope is one of our major specialties! It's a really fine forum and please talk to us about anything on your mind. We can offer all kinds of help. Where in Kentucky are you from?

 

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I am sorry you're going through this too
I'm the same... bladder and bowel
I also have a lot of issues at night, especially with getting back to sleep after doing what I need to do

 

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This is my first time posting, I'm thinking that I'm happy I found this group. I have urinary incontinence. I had the bowel incontinence too, but rectal cancer took care of that.
I hate the feeling of constantly sitting in a wet diaper. This keeps me from putting on clothes, getting out of bed, or going anywhere for fear of leaking. This makes life miserable.
I am going to look into some of the different diapers mentioned in this posting to see if i can find something that works better than what I'm using.

 

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@graphicedge Yes, you will find many answers here that can help you emotionally and practically regain some of your confidence. Welcome! I dig your user name!

 

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Hi @graphicedge, Yes that is an interesting user name! And welcome! We do specialize in providing answers to any of your questions so please feel free to ask away!!! My philosophy is no question is too dumb. As for looking for different diapers there are plenty of vendors online who you can consult with and most if not all of them will be happy to send you any samples you request. One that comes to mind is North Shore out of Chicago and depending on what part of the country you live in there are plenty of other places. When you get the samples you can then judge best what will work for you (as well as which ones won't). So please stop in anytime even just to say Hi!

 

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Hi graphicedge,
Welcome to the forum. Glad to have you here.
Hope you find you are not alone and there is are some wonderful folks and information to help here.

 

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Welcome to the forum Graphicedge.

 

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Thank you Billiveshere. I'm from Greenup county ky. Almost on the Ohio river in Lloyd. I'm really glad i found this form. Questions, yes i have or had them, but as i look thru the questions i find my answers or directions. I'm so thankful i found this form.

 

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Glad you are here
I’m in Maryland

 

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Hi @Kentuckian, that's pretty nice country up along there and on the Ohio River. I'm in central Florida my self and have driven up through Kentucky and Ohio. Maybe once this blasted covid ends I can think about other trips. But any time you have questions about things that are happening to you or what products to use, the door to this forum is always open! Just like what the boss at work tells you, right???? (How many of you have had bosses who tell you "my door is always open.?"

 

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Thank you so much everyone for giving me your support and advice, I will try and respond to all the messages when I can get some time to read them. But I am really glad to have this resource, it truly feels really lonely with this issue especially the bowel incontinence makes me feel really dependent on briefs,
even though the best ones arent the most comfortable.

That is one thing I am curious about. I basically use overnight briefs 24/7, I havent yet found anything less bulky be able to help deal with the sort of inconetinence I have. And this is the most cost efficient for me because I basically just have to change when I have a bowel accident which unfortunately is more frequent than I'd like. Would really appreciate some info on that area.