does your children know about your inco

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Does your children know about your incontinence problems. Or do u hide it from them all my daughter s know about mine and about me wearing. Dappers

 

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I don't have any children of my own. But I do have a younger niece and nephew who know. She is 13 and he is 16. They have occasionally asked me a few questions about it but other than that it isn't an issue. It's interesting trying to explain things like incontinence to young people. I basically just told them that my body doesn't work right and even though diapers seem "babyish" it's actually a very adult solution.

 

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I have a daughter that is a rn she knows.

 

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I don't have any kids, but I have a 17 year old cousin that lives with me. I have also babysat him often throughout the years. When my problems started about 5 years ago, he did end up finding out when I was watching him and his brother for a week while their dad was away. He was curious as he never thought a guy in their 20's would need to wear diapers. He told me his older brother used to be a “diaper boy” too (he wore at night until 8 or 9, which I already knew). After that, it rarely came up and he never thought any less of me. His dad was away a lot and he liked that I was the one that stayed with them.

He had some problems at home for the last few years, so I agreed to let him live with me during his senior year of high school. Everything works out well and he still rarely makes comments about it and never with any malice. The only thing that still makes me feel uneasy is when he has friends over. I usually wear sweat pants around the house, which doesn’t cover the noise of the plastic cover crinkle. None of them have said anything, but sometimes I put on jeans if I know they are coming over because I am embarrassed.

I guess as kids get older, they become more accepting and mature of differences. I am not sure how younger kids would react, but I think their love for you will trump any negative thoughts or feelings about your situation. I am in a long term relationship and will hope to have kids within a few years, so I know I will have to tackle this subject soon.

 

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My son is 4. He knows but isn't concerned about it. I wear mainly at night but occasionally have days will I am wetting like crazy. All we can figure is that is some kind of muscle spasm. He toilet trained pretty much overnight at 2 1/2 when he decided he was ready, and was night trained a month before he turned 4. It hasn't been an issue.

 

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My boys are 9 and 11. They do not know. I dread having to explain it to them. I dread even more them knowing that dad has a diaper under his pajamas. Then again, the day will come and we will all deal with it.

 

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My two boys are 6 1/2 and 5. They both know I have bladder problems. They see the diapers and the foley supplies. We live in a one story ranch, it's 1200 square feet. There isn't a ton of room to hide. Wife and I make an effort to minimize exposure, but they see me in diapers occasionally. I don't like to advertise it, But it's hard to hide here. We have been as up front with them as we could be without offering too much information. Kids have a tremendous ability to understand the basics and if you make it clear to them that it's an issue that is very private they are pretty good about keeping it to themselves. Further, if you don't call excessive attention to the fact that you're in diapers, they won't think much of it.

 

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My son is only 17 months old. I only wear heavy diapers at night, pullups during the day. I do worry about how I'll deal with that when he's older. Especially since my OAB urge incon is getting worse and I think I'm going to have to start wearing more substantial protection during the day.

 

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Thinking about this issue, it think of a couple concerns or worries when thinking about this.

1. How will it affect my child
I don't think this would have much impact. It didn't effect my sons toilet training. Long term I worry about it causing difficulty with peers. But in all honesty, if kids want to tease or bully him, they will find any excuse to do it. Also if I model being confident in diapers, it may help him to be more confident and accepting of himself. I also think it will help him to have more empathy for individuals with disabilities and be able to see them as more then a disability.

2. How will it affect my relationship with my child

If you have a positive relationship with your child, provide love, care, support and consistency, and attention, it won't matter whether you are in a diaper or not. They will love you for everything else you do.


3. How will it affect how my child sees me.
I think my son will see this as only part of who I am not the whole me. He will know the kind part, the smartass, the geek, and as his father. I think how your son sees you is going to go way beyond whether or not you wear diapers.

Ultimately I think that wearing diapers just provides another opportunity to teach my son to be an adult and a good person.

 

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My older son (now 6 1/2) came home from kindergarten (last school year) and said, "Daddy, one of the kids at school wears diapers!" (Totally out of the blue and random) I said "how do you know?" He said "I saw it while we were on the playground" I took this as a teachable moment to tell him that some people have problems with their bodies that they can't control. Everybody is different and everybody struggles with something. We should never bully or be mean to somebody because they wear diapers to school or have some other sort of disability. I never heard him speak any more about the kid. I hope what I said made an impact. Kids are smarter and more perceptive than we sometimes give them credit for.