Thank you Alas,
I relocated from Chicago, close enough to to see 2nd base of Wrigley Field from my home office, as well as a 100 acre farm in the country outside of Urbana-Champaign when I accepted adjunct-teaching position at University of Illinois after my “accident” if that’s what you call an unlicensed 4+ DUI Drunken illegal alien who blew a 3.6 on the breathalyzer. 08 is drunk in most if not all states, 3 beers in 1 hour, so something like 30+ beers, more likely 15 beers/15shots of Tequila over the morning as he crossed the centerline and hit me head on on my Harley at estimated 70+ mph, me doing around 30, so speed at impact of over 100mph. As I explained in earlier posts, in 1987 just after getting my MBA at UC San Diego, opening my 4th auto/sports/ racing shops & getting married, Driving my new Saab Convertible we picked up in Europe I was rear ended/ run over by an 80,000 pound gravel truck. After being cut out of my brand new car I realized once I woke up in the ICU I was completely incontinent both bowel and bladder. Anyone around my age might remember there were no disposable products of any value, just cotton diapers and plastic pants. I was so mortified I ended up selling all of my shops(My entire dreams from the time I was a kid)! Lucky for me my wife prior to that my girlfriend since I was 15, left me, couldn’t handle muscle man/ Martial Arts nut in a diaper... After wallowing in self pity and cutting myself off from everyone that meant anything to me, I figured out I better get some help. Life #2! I took a contract position with NASA working on the first GPS Prototype for cars through a good friend who was fully aware of my situation. This led to a job in Global Finance (Wall Street was heavily recruiting us numbers guys as NASA was getting positioned for major layoffs after the Challenger investigation was coming to completion and the continuation of the Shuttle Program was under question...
Took the offer & was sent to Chicago to learn at the Board of Trade and the Merch. I realized with my brokers license I could also sell/ broker real estate. Still intentionally single, hard enough going through the day & keeping business under control, I wasn’t getting into a risky relationship, that was just too much...One evening working late, I thought I was alone, grabbed my back pack and headed to the bathroom to change. About a second later the bathroom door opened, me standing there in a very wet diaper & plastic pants with a clean one in hand, and my cute, fun secretary staring back at me holding her own clean diaper??? WTH? THIS IS MY DISEASE!!! We spent the entire night talking, turned out she had never experienced control but had a wonderfully full life! She taught me more about living than any shrink could in a million years! We dated for about a year before I bought a furniture company and had to move out of Chicago, but she had let me out of my cell!
1997 rolls in, I’ve got 33 furniture stores going, was getting store number 34 ready to open, the Mayor is coming to cut the ribbon etc, etc. long story short, my Martial Arts had always been my physical balance since I was 8 years old, and you could wear just about anything under a Gi! To blow off pressure I went to the Dojo early arriving at the store about 10:am thinking the 5 semi’s of furniture would be unloaded and being stored or placed where the designers wanted it. Instead I arrive to 20 guys still hanging around drinking coffee. In my rage I grabbed a box containing a two hundred pound sofa frame. Heading to the basement I went down the first set of stairs only to go right through the landing. I was knocked unconscious, but was pinned into place by my neck & shoulders and once again those incredible firefighters saved my ass. They had to cut out the walls and the remainder of the stairwell to get me out, don’t remember any of it. Once again, Tom wakes up in the ICU, 3 days later. Again with tubes and wires, cables etc. I was in traction trying to stretch me back to 5’11! After 4 weeks in the hospital with a few more surgeries, Tom was back to rehab AGAIN! I was made an offer to go back into “JUST” finance, but it would require a bit of travel. I sold my furniture stores to a National Retailer and before I could blink I was doing business all around the world, minus Russia & China. I had offices in Chicago, New York, London, Dubai, Sydney & San Francisco and appearing on US TV shows on Wednesday & Friday.
This is how I met the love of my life, my incredible Wife. She has spent her career in medicine and as long as I continue to fight, she will continue to have my back. She is 100lbs of fight, I couldn’t have picked a better partner in life, she just happened to drop in by mistake, oh what a great mistake!
I have rambled on and probably shared more of my story that at any other time in my life, with for the most part; complete strangers. My hope is that although I have been through a lot (remember me mentioning giving any new Doc I give them a printed copy of my history in detail, it’s a book!). Part of my reasoning is this, for the first time in my life, I’ve never seen so many people with so many fears;Real & pounded into us by the media come together and offer so much of themselves in order to help others. In my own community here in Raleigh, NC, We have an app that everyone is logged onto just to keep track of who is doing what for whom, simply to keep from duplicating efforts as there appears to be far more volunteers than there are people in need. I’m sorry, but I can honestly say I’ve never seen anything like it.
And if by sharing some of my story it can give hope to just one person out there then I’ll be satisfied. See we humans have this odd thing called hope. And when I say that it’s with a caveat. After 1987, and what it took to claim my life back, I “knew” I’d never go through anything like that again!
Surprise! 1997 sneaks up and takes a bite out of my ass! Thank a God! I’ll never end up in the ICU again, let’s get living Tom!
2007, BAM! You’ll never walk again, you’ll never use your right arm again, the fecal incontinence is back after a 13 year hiatus, your beautiful Harleys are all being sold, your life savings is being spent and BTW you’ll be in a wheelchair the rest of your life...
No I refuse to listen to this and I swear to all of you “I WILL WALK OUT OF HERE”. It took me about a year of screaming agony, but trust me I’m no track star, but I hike two hours a day 5-6 days a week with my AMAZING partner in crime, a Siberian Red Husky named Blue. I go to physical therapy three days a week, and if I’m to tired because I never slept last night, then my beautiful wife is kicking me in the ass, reminding me of my promise to “MYSELF” and to her. My life couldn’t be better!, This is my best life, just make yourself a promise to live yours!
Stay healthy everybody, look forward to hearing from Y’all as we fight to get through this together! God Bless you all...
hope everyone has. Nice Saturday despite the shelter at home situation gone on.