Victim Mocking

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Hey Guys,

Are you familiar with Victim Mocking? I have a narcissistic ex who i had to file an order of protection against - but they still have my cat.

Long story short, his mom is a cat hoarder who will psychologically justify not giving someone cats back because she has it mentally in her head that all cats belong to her (she has over 25 cats in her home. It's extremely sad).

Anyway, I gave back my Ex's belongings that he left behind, and I went through the trouble of sorting out clothes, donating clothes that didn't fit, and tried to make any accomodation possible to show that all I want is my cat back.

She slept with me every night, and my abusive ex would force me to sleep with her because he didn't want to take care of her. She felt so comfortable in my arms and she chose me as a bonding owner.

I miss her terribly.

Well anyway, Ive made posts on Facebook about how much I miss her hoping his family will do the right thing - and I saw on my news feed he updated his Facebook cover photo to this.

I changed to black and white and edited the photo so it can't be backtraced by them.

But it's extremely mentally manipulative to see someone be upset over losing there cat and then go through the steps of making cat posts of the specific cat you lost when there is 25 other cats in that home that deserve love too.

It's extremely sad. Anyway, cats don't have rights compared to dogs from what the ASPCA told me - and that's even worse for hope to get her back.

She was my Shiloh...

Anyway, this relates to bladder health because she was one of the few emotional support animals that I fully connected with and took care of. I always fed them, cleaned them, and took care of them - while he refused to do any sort of picking up after them - which makes me more worried about them now; as they do not deserve to be in what I consider bad living conditions for cats.

Can anybody relate to people in your life mentally manipulating you to somehow get off or gain satisfaction on your bad fortune or heart loss?

Blessings In Christ,
Honeeecombs

 

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Sadly you lost your cat, but you got rid of a huge problem getting that person out of your life. I suggest you delete / block that person, and DO NOT inflict anymore harm on yourself by looking at their social media. You are moving in all the right directions, cut that horrible actor loose once and for all!
When it’s acceptable, I don’t know the rules where you live, go out and adopt a new kitty, by doing so you have saved a life while making yours mor fulfilling…

 

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@Honeeecombs

So sad. Sorry you are going through this.

If another cat ever comes into your life then be sure to get it microchipped. Both my brother and sister-in-law and vet aids and it is the law in almost every state that they contact name on the microchip is the owner of the cat.

Please don't think that I am saying that any animal is going to replace the love you have for your fur baby. I still have a hard time talking about my last dog that I lost years ago. Pets make life better.

 

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@Honeeecombs You wouldn’t be allowed to have your cat in the home anyway, right? You can certainly adopt another cat when you return to living independently. Your ex’s cat will only ever remind you of your ex, so you should get a new one.

 

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Is there any chance that your exe's mother is breaking any bylaws by having so many felines? You could perhaps negotiate with her to lighten her load, though it sounds like she would not be amenable to that. Perhaps you could get the local humane society on-side, especially if they see fit to intervene. I mean, you're right, those cats can't be getting the best of care. If this woman is not in her right mind, would she actually miss 2 cats in particular?

 

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Very sad. did anyone mention cat-napping?!! I mean is it really stealing if it's YOUR cat? Do you have any papers of any kind? I would hope some authority of some kind could help...especially, if not good conditions. Could animal control secure all the animals on a 'tip' but have a pre-arranged agreement to have you 'adopt' your cat back?!!

That situation just makes me MAD and I would want to do something not so nice...

Anyway, on that note...trying to get back to my Christianity... LOL!!!

Good luck w/ the situation and +God+bless+ !!!