This is a bit off topic

[Archives1]

Basically I agree with everything posted above. May said it most succinctly especially the post about the word ‘safe’ as medical people are trained specifically to listen for that word and the immediate need too react to that word. And both you and your husband NEED relief.

Furthermore, you are on this forum posting aka you are a strong individual in a horrible situation currently and like May stated you want to live your story. Don’t get on the negative thought train as that doesn’t help anyone ever other than speeding up spiralling out of control and it only becomes more toxic.

The feeling of being scared is totally understandable and reasonable emotion to be feeling. Your subject that your post is a bit off topic is totally incorrect. This is the most important topic to raise as it involves your life and that should be important for anyone you are in discussions with. If not you shouldn’t be talking to them because they are a morally corrupt and toxic person.

You matter!!! Always.

You are in my prayers and I hope you get help and assistance as fast as heavenly possible. And all of us who have responded here are thinking of you....

Please give us updates as we all truly care about you.

With big hugs from up in Canada.

Jason

 

[Archives1]

Update. When I told my husband that I did not want to go to assisted living or a nursing home while he goes to therapy. He went ballistic and told me he is leaving next Thursday.
So just when I thought it could not get any worse, here it is. I just wish I was dead.

 

[Archives1]

You are dealing with a husband who is probably very burnt out on top of what ever else he has on his life.
Have you spoken to any of tge medical professionals you have?
The visiting nurse or your doctors?
Im sorry, you were dealt a very hard medical situation in life but there are times you must work with the resources available

 

[Archives1]

Yes I did. A social worker is coming out tomorrow and I am going to see if I can get counseling.

 

[Archives1]

What happened to the nurse?

 

[Archives1]

She is going to get me some temporary help with the TPN, but I will have to learn how to do it for myself.
We have a social worker coming out tomorrow. But I do not know if my husband will participate. Im going to ask for counseling, so I don't go off the deep end.

 

[Archives1]

Each of you needs a counselor. You certainly can't be in charge of what he participates in or not but you are reaching out and you will use the experience

 

[Archives1]

Thanks May, my husband has a counselor and has been going to therapy sessions.

 

[Archives1]

Hi graphicedge,

You are stuck in a really tuff situation and honestly I personally think both yourself and your husband aren’t burnt out. Hopefully you find some good help for a bit because you both need it. I know this doesn’t sound good to you however I believe you both need to come at your unique situation in a different way that will work for both of you.

Jason

 

[Archives1]

Unfortunately our meeting with the social worker did not go well. I was willing to compromise and go to assisted living for two weeks but with him staying at a residence inn for the next two weeks giving him a month break. But my husband said no he needs 3 months, I can't afford 3 months at assisted living so here we are. I just don't see this ending well at all. When he would not compromise the social worker left and I just do not know how this gets resolved.

 

[Archives1]

I am so sorry that your husband was unwilling to compromise. Do you think that that social worker, or another one, would help him see the advisability of compromising? I think that him having one month without his responsibilities is very generous.

This is a personal question, but I wonder if staying married to him is beneficial to you, besides that he helps take care of you.

Do you want to rethink whether anyone you know would be willing to stay with you at your house to take care of you?

If you are eligible for Medicaid, they should be able to help with your medical and living expenses.

Wishing help comes your way.

 

[Archives1]

All good points. Apparently he is going to stay here until I have the procedure to change my neph tubes the first week of April. Then he has agreed to go to a residence inn and we will see if he gets any better. I have to hope that he actually goes to his therapy every day. Last time he got like this I was in much better health and was working. It took him 3 months to get himself sorted out. Only have Medicare, no Medicaid.