This is a bit off topic

Archives1

Archives1

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Im in a bad place right now. I have multiple conditions that require the help of a caregiver. I have 2 neph tubes, an illyostomy, and a peg tube. I am on TPN which is basically my lifeline as ive got practically no intestines left. Im still incontinent even though i went to neph tubes.
My caregiver who is my husband is having mental problems and is not going to be able to take care of me. Im not able to sfford to pay someone to do this. Im scared.
 
Graphicedge,

I'm truly sorry to hear of your situation. Life becomes scary when the plans we have stop working. At that point we need to come up with a new plan. I understand your physical and mental problems. Let's take a deep breath and see what options you do have to provide you the care and support you need.

Let's move in expanding circles looking for caregivers. These may not be permanent solutions but a means to give you the immediate help you need and work towards a long term solution. Do you have children, close family members or long time friends you can call on to give you immediate help? If not, then you need to move to the next outer circle which would be a member of your church or social network for assistance. The final outer circle is to seek help from the medical office for a referral to social welfare office. Each state is different but there should be a state office that can provide you some help.

Please continue to keep us updated and don't despair. Things are tough but you can take scariness out of this when you start devise a plan.

Praying for you,
Greensleeves351
 
I have no children, relatives live in other states and i have been in this condition for over 6 years so I have no social groups that I am a part of. I have some friends, but I don't think any of them would help. Ive tried asking relatives for help but have been told that they can't help.
When my nurse comes tomorrow I will ask for help, but I don't know if anything can be done. I guess my husband will get his wish and I will die and not be anyone's problem
 
Sorry to hear you are hurting. I agree with the advice above to keep looking for non-medical relationships that will help you feel less desperate. You have a lot going on and anyone would feel overwhelmed. Try not to despair and start by getting through today. Will pray for you also. Hang in there.
 
Sorry to about your medical issues. Reach out to any financial help you can like Medicaid or Medicare. Take care.
 
Graphicedge,

If your nurse is your link to the outside world then by all means show her this discussion thread and ask her for help. A trained professional will be able to open doors to social services and support you may not be aware.
 
There is One who is able to do far more than what we can imagine or believe. Jesus sent me this very message one day out of the blue as I worried about my future cancer treatment. It overwhelmed me with a flood of emotion.
All we have to do is to have faith in Him and ask for His help. He is in control, not us.
All of the above are great suggestions. He can make these or anything else happen if we believe in Him.
He did not immediately change my situation, but He did change my perspective. And he was with me during all of my treatments over a 2 year period and still is.
We pray for His healing hand to touch you with His strength and His peace. In Jesus’s name.
 
Graphicedge, I can only attest to what Harrisjmh has said- that Christ is Lord and He wants you to bring this to Him. We, all, need Him and He wants only to help you, but you must take the first step and trust Him. I can tell you that God is good; He loves you and wants you. There is nothing He cannot do, there is nothing He does not already know (so, as I have discovered, we can talk to Him about ANYTHING and won't surprise or shock Him) and He already knows how to take care of you. I beg you to sit and talk to Him. I am praying for you.
 
Hey Kiddo, Greensleeves is absolutely right, you must reach out through your nurse the work asked of you and your husband is too much to ask and you absolutely deserve to be comfortable and safe.
Please know that safe is an important word in the medical and legal community and if you say this it this virtually mandates they pay attention.
You and your husband both need relief.
God bless and keep you as once again, you take your strength and courage forward for another day.
 
Dear Graphicedge,

May is absolutely right in everything she wrote to you. My heart is breaking for you, and I take comfort in what she wrote. I hope you can take comfort in what she and the others wrote to you.

Thank you for reaching out to us. You feel hope, I believe, otherwise you wouldn't have written. Please take some good, renewing breaths. Show your nurse what you have written. Whatever nourishes your soul, whether prayer, music, nature ... I hope you will find solace in that.

My prayers are with you and your husband. What you wrote is not off topic, and you deserve all the help you need so that you can live.
 
Graphic you would nt be here if you weren't strong resilient and intelligent with with a strong will to l8ve your story
 
Thank you May, sometimes I just feel alone. Thank God for the people who are here responding. Thank you so much.
 
Hi @graphicedge, I'm sorry to read about your situation. It kind of feels like the rug was pulled out from under your feet. Please tell that to your nurse when she comes tomorrow. And show her this thread and just ask her to point you in the right direction to get help. And ask for referrals to social service groups and other support groups. I think it does take some looking your nurse in the eye and asking her "what would you do if you were in my situation?"
I agree with @Greensleeves351 to come up with a plan and enlist your nurse's help in following that.
Please know you have everyone's best wishes here and please keep us updated. You do have the will to live and that counts for a lot!
 
Yes, there are services available if you just reach out. Here, in Texas, they actually have services available for the elderly that provides assistance, similar to Child Protective Services.
 
Hi @graphicedge, And we are here to help you get through this!!! There's a lot of expertise and compassion here. You've got a lot of people on your side!!! I hope you have a good discussion with your nurse tomorrow that leads to others who will reach out and help you.
 
It bums me out to read when someone is asking for advice they get told to pray. Or that Jesus will fix everything. Such a crappy response.

Anyway. To the op: reach out to your nurse or if you have a case manager reach out to them. If you are on Medicaid or Medicare you can get home care services. I have an aide that comes 10 hours a day 7 days a week. Granted recently I’ve been solo on the weekend because I just need a break but you should definitely qualify for these things.
 
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