New member - suddenly started wetting myself

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I am new here and so glad to have found this forum. I’m hoping to find people who understand what I am experiencing and who might be able to offer some advice. I am feeling really, really embarrassed about this and don’t feel I can talk to family/friends about it. I feel the need to vent but also need some help.

I am only 28 years old, never had children but am wondering if I am developing urge incontinence. From reading online, my symptoms are pretty much identical. I have a HUGE phobia of doctors so haven’t spoken to anyone professional about this yet.

For several years, owing to some anxiety issues, I found it difficult to drink and was often severely dehydrated. Some days, I would only urinate once and it would be very dark in colour.

Over the past few months, with the help of a therapist, I managed to get past this fear and was feeling pretty pleased with myself, was drinking more, staying hydrated etc. It was really tough but I was initially so glad I’d done it.

However, I now cannot drink without getting the desperate urge (within 10-30 minutes afterwards usually)to urinate. It’s not gradual, it’s very sudden and I have to make it to the toilet really urgently. The length of time I can ‘hold’ for seems to be lessening and I am often starting to ‘go’ before I reach the bathroom.

I am concerned that all my years of not drinking properly have caused some permanent damage.

Any advice much appreciated. Thank you.

 

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Dehydration is terrible. Been there done that. I would highly suggest drinking plenty of water.

As to doctors I went to a urologist who prescribed physical therapy that helped a lot. There are also medications that can help with this as well. Please get to a urologist. I don’t know how to help push thru the phobia other than to say there is hope out there and this may be very treatable.

 

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@EleanorRose Welcome this is a very supportive and understanding group from many different walks of life and different levels of incontinence so you have come to the right place
the sudden onset of incontinence can be frightening and upsetting and you feel alone and isolated this is where a group like this really comes through we all have different stories with similar circumstances and you realize you are not the only one and you are not alone so welcome I hope you find the support you are looking for here I certainly have and even have made some friends here

 

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@Newbie2this Thank you for replying. You’re right about the dehydration, definitely not something I want to go back to but I am becoming hesitant to drink again in case I wet myself. I never usually drink much when I am at work anyway but have stopped drinking altogether when I am there because I am so worried about having an accident and someone seeing.

 

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@DPCARE Thank you so much. You’re right, it does feel quite frightening. It’s having a mental as well as physical impact on me and I am so glad to have found this forum. I feel I need to talk about what’s been happening to me but I am too embarrassed to do that in ‘real’ life and worried about what people would think.

 

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@EleanorRose I had a tendency to dehydration while I was at school because I wet myself regularly, so I understand how you feel. It took me about 10 years to seek medical help, but when I did, it wasn't a big deal and I was annoyed with myself for leaving it so long. Doctors, nurses and urologists have seen it all loads of times, try to get the courage to ask for help, hopefully you will feel better afterwards. Phil

 

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@physlink Thank you. Ironically, my original anxiety around drinking wasn’t to do with my bladder but now I seem to be developing a new anxiety around drinking and wetting myself. I’m glad to hear it wasn’t as bad as you’d been expecting when you saw the doctor.

 

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I do recall that when I started having issues and also had anxiety ramping up like crazy about it, the thing that actually helped the most with anxiety was wearing a diaper. I know how terrible it may seem at first but they can be worn relatively discreetly and if something does go wrong you won’t have an embarrassing situation to deal with. Especially at work.

 

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when you first start wearing diapers it can be scary and embarrassing especially with the general consensus being "only babies wear diapers" and "you want to be a big boy and big boys don't wear diapers" as long as this is the general attitude those of with incontinence and older kids with bedwetting issues are going to have a hard time accepting diapers and or pull-ups we need to change the perception of the diaper when you think about it what is a diaper really? It's just another form of underwear only it is a little more absorbent and waterproof once you get over the stigma and get used to wearing them diapers can be quite comfortable I now feel naked without a diaper on we need to change the perception of a diaper so when someone needs to use them there is no stigma attached

I do recall that when I started having issues and also had anxiety ramping up like crazy about it, the thing that actually helped the most with anxiety was wearing a diaper. I know how terrible it may seem at first but they can be worn relatively discreetly and if something does go wrong you won’t have an embarrassing situation to deal with. Especially at work.

 

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Hi Eleanor,
Glad your here. Very nice to have you and hope you find some useful information to help with your urge and anxiety.
Wish you and everyone here a relaxing and peaceful Sunday afternoon.
Kind regards,
Jim

 

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I would say to at least wear some protection while you figure out what to do for medical care. It will help you not feel so anxious about an accident while you try to figure things out.

 

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Hi Eleanor, I feel for you, I felt the same way when mine started after I had my first baby. I am 69 almost I started to wear just a pad for many many years and now I wear pull ups and a pad in them for extra security. I have been to a lot of different Drs, which didn't help much. I was a bedwetter as a child till about 5th grade then it all went away. It really bother me when I was a child then it left me for 20 years or so, well as I said it came back when I had children, I started to wet bed again at 67 boy was I upset. I did finally find A Urogynesist who told me I have urge and oab. she is helping me a lot, I was on quite a lot of meds and I am weening off of them and changed my high blood pressure pills and now things are getting better. I haven't wet the Bed for four nites now since changing the pills. she also said sometime if you wet the bed as a child It can comeback again. I asked many drs if that had anything to do with it and they all said probably not. My advice is keep going to different Drs, to you find one that can help you. Also Check if any meds are causing it. Good luck and I know how you feel.,May God Bless you

 

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Thank you for the words of wisdom and encouragement.
Have a nice week this week everyone. Be Blessed, and be a Blessing to someone else.
Jim

 

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@EleanorRose I get the same immediate urgency and can't hold it in issue too. I have discovered (without the help of a doctor) that specific ingredients and medications bring it on and when I lay off it goes away. Anxiety is a huge factor as well. I have discovered that when I consume syrup based sugar I get the urinary issues. You can waste alot of energy money and time going to doctors just to have them tell you that they don't know the cause of have any answers and or they will tell you non clinical things like "keep a daily journal" Ask yourself do you really need to pay a so called "professional to tell you that? My advice stay away from syrup based sugar like Starbucks drinks and stay away from drinks that have dipotassium. If you have never had children and being in your 20s it is highly unlikely to be a bladder issue. More likely to be from your consumption or anxiety or your kidneys. If you choose to see a doctor then atleast see a real professional like a Nephrologist. I hope you find answers and resolution

 

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With incontinence, you should see a doctor as the incontinence can be a symptom of something more serious so you should seek medical help with incontinence to at least rule out other conditions that could be more serious

@EleanorRose I get the same immediate urgency and can't hold it in issue too. I have discovered (without the help of a doctor) that specific ingredients and medications bring it on and when I lay off it goes away. Anxiety is a huge factor as well. I have discovered that when I consume syrup based sugar I get the urinary issues. You can waste alot of energy money and time going to doctors just to have them tell you that they don't know the cause of have any answers and or they will tell you non clinical things like "keep a daily journal" Ask yourself do you really need to pay a so called "professional to tell you that? My advice stay away from syrup based sugar like Starbucks drinks and stay away from drinks that have dipotassium. If you have never had children and being in your 20s it is highly unlikely to be a bladder issue. More likely to be from your consumption or anxiety or your kidneys. If you choose to see a doctor then atleast see a real professional like a Nephrologist. I hope you find answers and resolution

 

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Welcome EleanorRose.You will find a good group of people with lots of information.

 

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Get some good protection to start with, and make a doctors appointment ASAP. They’ll most likely refer you to a specialist. Then like one poster said above, look at your liquid intake and see if you can find any triggers. The good news is, there are plenty of medications and other things that can cure or at least improve incontinence symptoms. And if you still have issues there are many good products out there that help you manage leaks. Good luck.

 

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I'd like to echo what was said above about wearing protective undergarments. You will find them in most drugstores and supermarkets. Also, I'd like to stress the importance of seeking medical care: a sudden onset like yours could mean that you have a urinary tract infection, which can become quite serious if left untreated, because sometimes infected kidneys don't work as well as healthy ones do, which can lead to having toxins circulating in your bloodstream. Your fasting blood sugar should be tested, as well as your hemoglobin A1c. These are tests for diabetes, one of the symptoms of which is frequency and urgency of urination. Best of luck, and welcome to the group.