Is 'back to normal' ever achievable?

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I'm approaching 8 months out from my RRP, not seeing a big change in continence, still getting through 5+ thick pads a day despite Kegels, exercise, etc. Now trying an OAB med (Imipramine) which helps although I'm not crazy about the side effects. Oh, and I still have a residual PSA of 0.13 as well, but I can't embark on radiotherapy until I'm dry.

But that's not the point of this post. My real question is this: assuming I deal with all of the above and somehow get dry and cancer-free eventually, is it realistic to expect to get back to the way things were before, or is there an inevitable permanent change that needs to be acknowledged?

Before the op (and before Covid) I was pretty active, enjoyed travel and hiking, both of which depend on being able to 'hold it' for a while, and I also enjoyed adventurous eating & drinking. I read a lot here about avoiding alcohol/caffeinated drinks - is that only until you're dry? I'm on a vegetarian/low sugar diet in an attempt to keep the cancer in check, but again I would like to eat meat again one day.

Anyway I'd love to hear about people who have actually made it all the way through the journey and whether it's possible to get back to 'normal'. What's the limit of 'holding it' with only one sphincter after you're dry?

Thanks

 

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I'm back to all activities I was doing prior to surgery...Aug 2019...but I still leak and use a pad. I think of the leakage as minimal. It took awhile but I finally made up my mind this wasn't going to be a life changer. Learn to work around what happens physically. I drink (including coffee) and eat what I want. I'm fortunate, so far, as my psa is still undetectable. This is my normal.

 

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Once your dry you will want to continue keagles as a maintenance routine for the rest of your life. Otherwise leakage could return.

 

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Was down to a light pad, very little leakage, but it took almost 10 years. Then went into septic shock & ICU, and it increased to the next thickness pad, 3 times a day including sleep. That tapered off to same as before. Then 5 years later, brain tumor removed and wow, on diapers. 3 years down the road and it has tapered to very little, the thinnest pads, can go through a night without, but pee about 5 times.
I'm Lucky; PSA still zero after all these years.
I hope you are paying attention to yours, and the Doc is too.
We hear from guys who go to zero, but I suspect we are weighted to those who don't, as those who leak come here, and some of those that end up not leaking don't report back when they go to zero.
Good luck n the PSA.

 

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One thing that will become very clear on this site is that everyone’s journey and healing is very different.
There is no normal. And if you try and compare yourself to those lucky guys that are dry sooner than you then it will just create unnecessary stress and worry.
I am 4 months post-op and still leak. It’s only been the last week or so that I have seen any minor improvement. And that could be all be in my head.
So a lot of us deal with it and try to live normal lives with the caveat that we need some protection.
Personally, I don’t make it a secret and actually joke about it.
My mantra is that it will not keep me from doing the things I really need or want to do. Within my new limitations.
As the prior post just said, this is our new normal.
And you will persevere.
All the best