How many people have had this their whole life?

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a few of my teachers saw this as an issue and actually used to tell me things like, as long as you smell like that, you're not allowed to use the computer, or shower or I'm sending you home. it's sad that some of my earliest memories of it were people using it in a negative way, but yep. I remember it happening to me several times
my teachers for some reason were never that understanding of me

 

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That's sad when teachers are not very understanding of the needs of their students. After all are the teachers so perfect that they have never had human issues themselves???? I don't think so!!

 

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Another lifer. OAB and bed wetting issues that never resolved. Just one more thing that makes me human.

Welcome to the forum.

 

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Hi, I just joined and I have had this all my life. Never really stopped. I have tried to hide it but...turning 30 soon.

 

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Don't be ashamed. More people have this or a similar issue than will admit to it. It's sad that there are a lot of people who don't understand we can't control it. It has been brought out in the open and more accepting than years ago.

 

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welcome, ashamed mama. it's nice to meet you.. hopefully this site will help you on your journey

 

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at bill: you would really like to think so, especially since teachers are like the first people in your life who are meant to give you direction and advice (well their's parents, but in my case they did more harm than good). I have had positive experiences with teachers, (you get the good, you get the bad), but they just wern't very accomadating when it came to my issues

 

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HI @AshamedMama, Welcome to our forum! All of us here have this issue in one form or another and everyone here is happy to share what they know and advise you. Everyone here is non-judgmental and very supportive. But please don't feel ashamed because anything can malfunction with any body system at any age. Unfortunately the overall understanding of incontinence hasn't caught up yet with peoples' understanding of issues such as orthopedic, or cardiovascular or respiratory. With us, please feel free to discuss whatever is on your mind. We are all about educating other people on our particular issue and you have come to the right place.

 

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I’m a lifelong bedwetter and now urine incontinent. Always had daytime issues - very late to train and always daytime accidents. Underdeveloped bladder. Sphincter won’t close. I was offered a surgical option but I declined. I’d rather wear a diaper.

 

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Hi @Jason, I agree that if I were offered a surgical option I would probably decline it. Of course that depends entirely on exactly what the surgical option is. But when discussing surgery, it's a matter of weighing the benefits versus the risks. Surgery is an invasion of the body and has to be viewed as such. There's the recovery time, pain, time lost from work and likelihood of complications to consider. Also to be considered is what is the overall rate of success and will the surgical option over time lose its effectiveness?? So there is a lot to think about and contemplating surgery isn't something to be taken lightly. And now I'm wondering if you've had other opinions, like maybe surgery that isn't the same as what was proposed to you or even a newer technique that's been made available since. Just food for thought!

 

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@billliveshere In the 1980s a urologist offered an option that would leave me with a button to push to release urine. It still would not increase bladder capacity so I’d be pressing a button every hour and I’d move it to the “on” position every night. I’m sure a more modern artificial bladder is available today. But I don’t want to change. I like wearing a diaper. I’m comfortable and secure in my diaper. I don’t want to be any other way. I like myself the way I am. I don’t think anything is wrong with me. Wearing a diaper and wetting myself is totally natural to me.

 

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I didn't have a problem with incontinence from age 7 to 14. But other than that, I've had to deal with it my whole life. Going through high school was tough. I'm 22 now, and about to graduate college. I have learned how to manage my incontinence issues and life is much better. But my darkest days are still fresh in my mind. My heart goes out to all of you who are struggling.

 

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Hi @Jason,having read that, I completely concur with your decision to reject that particular surgery. If I were you and were offered that option, I would also go that same route! And it's great that you're happy with the way things are and that there is really no good reason to change that. So it sounds like it was a great decision you made with a good outcome!! In dealing with medical science sometimes it's best to just keep things the way they are!!!

 

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@billliveshere The surgery was pretty barbaric in the 1980s. It’s much better now. A few months ago, a gentleman in this forum started a thread about his young urine incontinent son and the pressure to “fix” him with surgery - changing diapers was getting tiresome and his wife was concerned about social issues. I resisted responding but I saw myself in that arena. All too often, children are subject to unnecessary surgery in order to conform. This is especially true when there is gender ambiguity. A child is surgically altered to one gender but later identifies as the opposite gender. What was removed can’t be replaced. All cases of optional child surgery require the greatest of scrutiny.

For years I lived in shame and embarrassment when all the while I was exactly who I wanted to be. Some men wear briefs. Some men wear boxer shorts. I wear diapers. What’s the big deal? I don’t want to be any other way, just like the folks who take issue with me. I respect your identity. Please respect mine.

 

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Hi Jason, I think I remember that thread and the consensus was to have the boy wear diapers as he has been doing and then when he gets old enough explain the details of the surgery to enable him to decide for himself whether he wants to go that route or not.
But you have chosen wisely and have taken ownership or your particular situation. And if folks take issue with what you have chosen, well, you're not choosing for them, you're choosing for yourself and that's what matters!!! Just like anything else you're doing what pleases you and what you're most comfortable doing. The only thing that matters is you!!

 

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I went through a similar surgical nightmare in 1990. Sadly out of desperation and youth I believed these Doctors really knew what they were doing. Promising by removing the lesions in my bladder which according to the Docs were causing the Interstitial Cystitis, they could stop the unending, painful spasms. Apparently they were still unaware that the entire bladder lining is innervated, so when they took a laser and started blasting away I was immediately in 11 out of 10 pain! They just gave me more juice knocking me out. When I awoke I was in the worst fiery pain I’d ever felt, and I had already recovered from crushed back, neck, shoulders hips, legs etc. in the accident, this was a whole new ball game! A different urologist treated me afterward with washes etc. to calm things down, but it has been 30 years of HELL because of what they did. 2 years of Dilauded every 2hrs. on top of long acting pain meds, I had to once again put my life on hold for almost two years as the pain was so intense sitting upright was horrible, riding in a car made me want to pass out at every bump. I had no recourse as I had stupidly signed a release without looking for other case studies etc.
Be CAREFUL! Sadly I’ve learned over time, we tend to give some Doctors far too much power over our lives, without having earned it...

 

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I've been a bedwetter my entire life. I do pee in my pants sometimes during the day, but my bedwetting accidents are my main issue. I currently wear the Walmart brand overnight pull-ups to bed and have only had them leak a few times. The mattress protector catches if I leak or if I forget to wear a pull-up to bed.