I don’t comment often, but to say people are “non-judgmental” is a bit of a fallacy. We are human, we have a brain, we are emotional, and based on our life experiences we distinguish between what’s right or wrong or good or bad. We are judgemental, we can’t help it. However, generally, we don’t always have to express our judgements, whether we respond or how we respond to others is a choice, it is under our control most of the time. Sometimes it’s tough, but if we try to be empathetic and polite, we try to listen and we are careful with our responses, we can minimise the shame people suffer when they believe they are being judged by others.
That said it is easier to this when we respect and trust those we are responding to. A key aspect to trust and respect is honesty. When I read some of the posts on these forums, especially those which are inconsistent with my life experiences, I become suspicious, and it erodes my trust and respect.
In a public forum, particularly one like this one, where we sit behind the anonymity of a keyboard, our life experiences have taught us to be suspicious about others. Are they who the claim to be? What is their motivation for engaging? We are raised not only to respect others privacy and we often fail to be completely honest and open to protect our own privacy, or protect ourselves from shame, guilt or embarrassment. So yes, I am often suspicious of some of the posts in this forum. I do judge, but I am also cautious of what I post and try not to offend, so hence my contributions to this forum have been minimal.
) but his heart behind it was to actually defend you, as evidenced by his next comment on this thread.
Sarah that's my point I was trying to make. Sorry that I'm not as smart as some of you are. Why am I being judged of my spelling or grammar??? This is what I mean. You say group is not like this but it is in someways. I hope you're not saying I'm dumb.