Protection Dependency

Archives1

Archives1

Staff member
Hey guys/gals,

Does anybody feel that sometimes they feel that there is a dependency to give in to wearing protection to stop pain/urgency issues?

I had an incident today where i needed to do a task when i was starting to have severe spasms. Needless to say, i barely made it after doing this quick task and was within seconds of relieving myself and wetting my pants. Right now im having urgency issues again day-time wise - but have always had issues at night - but i cant help but feel stupid for wanting to wear protection but also im in a rock and a hard place because its this never endind battle of aches, urges and pains.

I feel ive gone backwards in the sense that now if i was to wear again due to my day-time issues id be a recluse again due to my social quirks - and id rather just stay at home and deal with this hoping one day things improve.

Im trying to eat healthiest, drink clear liquids and i definetly feel a difference in my overall health weight and skin wise - but regardless of how healthy i am - my bladder issues never go away.

Why me?

Kindly,
Honeeecombs
 
We're I work I have to go to the 2nd floor or basement to use bathroom. Although I can make it most of the time. There are plenty of times I don't. Same at home but make to the bathroom much more.
 
@Honeeecombs I have to wear something all the time. I have mostly just little squirts. I wear separate pouch underwear. One pouch for the testicles and one for the penis. Then I use TP to line the pouch and absorb the little leaks and then change it out for dry when I get to the restroom. Running water to was my hands or cold air from opening the freezer and other things seem to trigger my urges. Some times I am close enough to the bathroom at home and don't have to change the TP. If I go out I do put a good fresh TP pad in though. If I travel all day I have to not drink anything until I get where I am going or the TP is not up to the volume when bathrooms take a lot longer to get to. I would need to wear a diaper now if I was going to travel all day and drink liquids. Even around the house I have to use the TP or my underwear and shorts will get wet. I like TP as it is already in the restrooms and I don't have to worry about running out of other pads or diapers. A bit less expensive also. So I am dependent 24 7.
 
Are you saying you are or are not going out more because you can often manage with out a full protection?

I have found myself that when I'm out socially I don't feel the need to pee as often. It's as if I'm distracted by social situations. I can forget about the bladder and urges.

If I stay home which I do much of the time,I am aware of going to pee much more often and being triggered with extreme urgency by ordinary activity in the house.

The pain and spasms might be a from a long standing trauma you've described before. But is it possible a pad would alleviate some of the concern so you can get out to be in public or social settings and not be so concentrated on the pains?

And by the way full congratulations on your choosing healthy lifestyle and nutrition!! You are doing so well even if working with the issues.
 
@Honeeecombs I'm in a similar boat with my combined dribble and urge incontinence. For the dribbling part I can't do anything, I can't feel or control it, but those are only small amounts.
My urges are much worse. Very several times a day (and of course nights) the urges come up - growing very fast. I can try to hold, if I do so two things can happen: either the urge goes away within a few seconds and everything is fine, or it starts hurting seconds later and I can't hold it any more.
So what do I do in practice? As I have to wear protection anyways (for the dribbling part), I decided for more absorbent ones so that if an urge hits I've always the possibility to release with the pain. And, to be very honest, after many, many months I more and more often decided to release already with the urge coming up BEFORE the pain starts! It's not fun to run around 15 times a day into the painful cramps, hoping it will disappear in a few seconds - and if not, it will release anyway in my diaper...
Yes, of course if nearby a toilet, I'll make it to reach, but very, very often I don't and in the nights I also gave up the mostly unsuccessful sprints to the bathroom with long time periods before finding back to sleep.
I have fully accepted that my quality of life is much, much better with accepting my incontinence and wearing proper protection instead of arranging my life around my IC. Since then I im able to continue my active and social life without limitations in nearly the same way as before.

Honeeecombs, you are for sure not stupid for wanting to wear protection, for me exactly this was the key to return to a happy and fulfilled active and also social life without any pain. I got over any kind of shame or embarrassment - nobody else can see (with appropriate clothing), my wife also has absolutely no regrets how I manage my IC - she's happy as long as I feel good with what I'm doing and supports me fully.

And, @20lawlorg, an AUS is for sure not the solution. The "holding back" is not the main problem, the problem are the urge cramps if holding back!
For sure I could take additional meds (to the 5 I have to take daily and permanent concerning heart beat and blood pressure issues after a stroke) to suppress the urges (with not very nice and partial counter-productive side effects) or I could try botox injections, but I'm happy that my protection works fine and has not any further side effects for me!
 
@dalexwitte How inappropriate of your workplace to have no bathrooms closer to you; sorry to hear about that! If you ever need that to be solved or addressed by an outside government agency, you could file a complaint with OSHA or the ADA. I bet they would file an anonymous complaint, just saying they heard from an employee, such and such about their bathrooms, but without giving your name.
 
@Honeeecombs Hello; I just wrote a response on my phone but it accidentally got deleted. I’ll reply more in the morning.
 
I guess I would be dependent on protection. Some days I can getaway with just pull-ups but other days I need to wear diapers most days. I tried but over the years I have found was to deal with my incontinence bladder problem. For me it’s to try different things when recommended and to never give up. Hopefully someday I be free of needing diapers or pull-ups.
 
@Honeeecombs Sounds like me pre the Long Covid issues in terms of being annoyed at that one embarrassing aspect of health.

I'd also say that going out wearing protection definitely takes some getting used to but gets better over time. Whilst I'm definitely more anxious if I'm around people my own age no one's ever said anything. Having two full years at the end of school of being miserable because my dry-clean only trousers were washed once a week so stank come the end of Friday (I used deodorant to try and mask the smell), I quickly realised that it was better not having to worry about leaks when I started wearing pull ups to uni.

I also figured that people could probably smell the urine anyway (but may not have figured I was the culprit) so I figured it's probably not any less noticeable or indiscreet wearing protection.

Post Long Covid, there's no way I could even hide the accidents/leakage nowadays so it isn't an option but to be protected.
 
I think what I was trying to say is if using protection eases your mind and helps you to be out in the world go for it!!
 
@Maymay941 I think this is the key really. @Honeeecombs I don't know if this anecdote will help but when my IBS flare-ups started becoming more regular as I got older, I'd have days that I just wouldn't leave the house if my stomach was playing up. When I started using protection for that, whilst I was super awkward about wearing bigger protection for IBS, I realised that I'd never have left the house were it not for the protection and that it was actually helping me get out the house.
 
Thanks guys for the support; i always feel like sometimes this is a second home for myself so it's nice to see such a warm welcome even when I haven't been active.

Today was about the same in urgency and issues - maybe a little bit worse; I did wear protection for a little while because it got to the point where I was going 7-8 times in a span of an hour so I decided to just give in and play some video games and pass the time not trying to think about my spasms.

It wasn't bad; just a little defeating. Keeping my chin up and hoping things improve; it's like riding a wave - just gotta ride it out.

Sincerely,
Honeeecombs
 
Always wonder when you go quiet on us.

Do you have spasms when you are anxious about the possible urge but less spasms when you have a level of protection?
 
@honeeecombs
We do what we have to do to get on top of the problem. I use an external catheter, drain tube, and leg bag. IT IS NOT TROUBLE-FREE, BUT THE BEST FOR ME. I must not bend over to pick up a hundred-dollar bill. It will break the catheter seal and turn on the spigot. I've learned the hard way to carry a quality penile clamp in my pocket. If I'm going to be active, I install the external catheter - CAREFULLY - and I then have a couple of hours of freedom with no fears of flooding. The best clamps cost$40-$50. WELL WORTH IT.
 
@DanCarr “. . . to get on top of the problem.”

Thanks for introducing me to that neat expression; you can bet I’ll be using that in a future leadership meeting!
 
I just had an Axonix device implanted under my skin on the right side at the top of my buttocks -- at Sacral level of my Spine. It was helping, but then got bladder infection caused by Klebsiella pneumoniae. Axonic Representative said that while I had the UTI the Axonic device would not work. She's right! It doesn't!! Am having heavy amount of Fecal Incontinence -- you know, the clear liquid or mucous secretions. These secretions are dripping down my inner thighs, continuing down my legs, into my feet & getting my socks wet! I hate it!
 
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