new onset adult bedwetting

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Hi Fellow Sufferers,
I am in my 30’s with a high stress professional life. The last thing that I need is dealing with new bedwetting. I dealt with bedwetting as a kid until I was in grade school and it was never a problem until now.
This has happened several times over the past month. Initially I thought it was due to alcohol from the holiday parties or sleep deprivation from the air travel and late nights. First it was at home and I got worried after it the first couple of times. I also got worried when it happened when I was flying on a redeye flight (Thank goodness I wore just-in case protection) After a string of these events, I saw my primary care doctor who couldn’t find a problem and referred me to a uro-gyn specialist. She ran some tests and everything was normal. Thats worse than finding a problem. So these doctors are telling me that they can’t find the problem which means there is no good solution. The specialist recommends trying desmopressin. I am undecided about this.
I wear diapers whenever I can possibly fall asleep (nighttime, air travel). This treats the symptom. However, it does not treat the underlying problem because I am told that I have no problem that they can treat. Are any of you in the same quandry? It is frustrating. How have you coped with this?

Thanks for listening to me.

 

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It seems you might be a woman by your handle?
this is a common issue for women and sometimes a physical therapist can recommend excercises to strengthem pelvic muscles. One more thing to do, right? just one more gotta do stress for the day.
But do research any drugs or botox injections as they have real side effects used long term.
Anyhow, hats off to you, you did yhe medical review you are doing the best you can. Always be kind to yourself and forgiving. Human bodies are not perfect but life goes on. Remember many others have this problem but its not widely disclosed. Best wishes.

 

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Seems like that’s the way this problem works. . We understand you’re peeing when you don’t want to. We are happy to report there seems to be nothing wrong. We understand you’re peeing when you don’t want to. What a shame. See you again in three months.

For me, it’s been 20 years of creative solutions that change from time to time. Some medical solutions have worked for a time.

 

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Seems like that’s the way this problem works

I second that notion.My urologist was like "Well I don't see anything wrong" which is great, but there is something wrong.

 

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its strange to feel so vulnerable as mastering control of our bladder is one of lifes earliest achievements and yet it is inexplicable when it is beyond us to control with no apparent reason or effect except to make every day life difficult.

 

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ts strange to feel so vulnerable

and the shame that goes with it. My first wife was a bed-wetter and was so ashamed she wouldn't get help.

 

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I can understand her embarrassment. I add to the list of reasons to not be able to have an intimate relationship. It isnt relaxing to be aware of peeing all night. But even more so after a medical professional tells you there is no cause or viable cure.
Kind of like sliding into mature adulthood, aka, aging, there a loss of control and a grieving for who we were.

 

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I am not embarassed by my bedwetting and having to wear diapers. I know enough people with more serious problems. This pales in comparison.
I am accustomed to identifying a problem and fixing the problem. My issue is the diapers aren't a real solution. The other issue with the diapers is that I wear them on night and I wake up dry. I do this several nights in a room and then I get surprised one morning that my diaper is wet. Sometimes I wish (not really) that it happened every night so that it was more predictable.

 

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People are so complex though. I was very patient with my first wife about this issue, and trust me it was a problem as she woulgn't even wear a diaper. It got very messy, yet I didn't shame her or complain because I sensed how painful it was for her. She never appreciated my patience nor even acknowledged it.

I guess my point is that the right person will understand and support you, and the wrong person won't.

 

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I am fortunate that wearing diapers on the plane or to bed is not a concern. Nobody on the plane knows and I mostly wear skirts to hide it better. I am seeing someone right now but our relationship hasn't gone that far that this would be an issue. We will see what happens as we become more serious

 

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its true, everyone has foibles and physical vulnerabilities so if someone cant tolerate them, then it isnt intimzcy. Good for your Squander for being patient.
And good travels for you Kim as you negotiate getting to know someone.

 

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i am older than you but have recently also developed this night time wetting, i have been also trying to find answer, i have read that sleep apnea can cause this,also hormone inbalance so i guess maybe a visit to the doctor for sleep apnea test, and gyno doctor to check hormone levels. hope you find some relief, i do know how frustrating this is.

 

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Hi girlypause,
You may not be older than me. I am in my 40's. The 23 in my name is related to my college uniform number.
Thats a good suggestion. I will talk to my docs about that. I hope I don't have sleep apnea but nobody can tell me if I snore at night.
Are you getting close to a diagnosis?

 

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Yoy can try getting in most of your fluids during the day and limiting or stopping all fluids 2-3 hours prior to bedtime. If you take medications right before bed use only as much water as needed to get the meds down.

 

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I have tried limiting fluids in the evening. I would still wake up with a wet diaper. Maybe its not as wet as it would have been if I drank water in the evening. But a wet diaper is a wet diaper; it doesn't matter how wet it is. So I have returned to drinking fluids in the evening as I did in the past.

 

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Kim,

Let me throw my 2 cents in. And especially if you go frequently in the day. I have OAB and I have found that bladder retraining, delaying longer during the day, is giving me more bladder capacity. Honestly it has also helped reduce night wetting! And yes, stay hydrated.

~Mel

 

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Kim, my 'onset bedwetting' came as a teen. Was dry at night until I started to have a few random accidents at night. From your post I can say that times of stress are a trigger for me. I can begging along with my normal occasional bedwetting, but put a stress factor in the mix and normal is not normal.

I remember once I had a difficult multi day test for work and I peed my bed most of the week. Then after the test and passing back to the normal pattern.

So maybe look at your stress level during the times you wet in sleep. Could be an indicator.

JT

 

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Hey Mel,
When you refer to bladder retraining, do you mean kegels or practicing holding it?

thanks
Kim

 

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Hey! I have occasional bedwetting issues. Unfortunately I think its part of thr high stress professional life. I'm almost 30 myself and an airline pilot so hotels are my reality. Just know its more common than you think and not tied to age like so many believe.

 

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Kim,

Yes bladder training is holding longer. On a schedule. Keep a diary of liquid consumed and bathroom visits. If you look at some of my old posts I explain it more.

~Mel