There are some really weird/hard to believe posts on here.

[justej]

I really liked this site when I first started posting but I’m starting to see more and more posts that just seem…..off. I know with forums that deal with incontinence you are gonna get the inevitable fetish people. But it just sucks when you are legitimately struggling with incontinence to have to deal with people who post crap just for thrills.

If I could go back to January 3rd of 2015 and not take the escalator I fell down that caused my issues (and the slew of medical problems that came with it) I would do it in a heartbeat. I hate having a suprapubic cath. Having a tube coming out of my stomach draining into a bag, the costs because insurance doesn’t pay for enough bags, stat locks, etc etc. the infections, the hospital stays, and the fact that I still have to wear diapers because of bladder spasms. It’s just so damn disrespectful to come on to a medical forum and pretend so you can live out your fantasies.

Sorry for the rant it just grinds my gears.

 

[bio]

Hi. I'm Bio and I'm happy to meet you. I became incontinent at the age of 33. I'm 41 now. I'm still relatively young. I have double incontinence, both urinary and fecal, and there's no way to change that, so diapers or catheters are the only solutions. And I don't want to use catheters. At first, I was desperate about it. I wanted to die and never leave the house again. Then, little by little, I decided I wanted to keep living, and I started opening up a bit on forums, where I discovered that diaper fetishists existed, something I was completely unaware of. But I have to tell you that thanks to some of them, I've managed to rebuild my life. Today, I even have a girlfriend. She doesn't wear diapers, but she has a very maternal spirit. I don't hang out with these fetishists now, but they've helped me a lot. And in any case, if I could go back, I too would avoid the episode that made me incontinent.

 

[bio]

Ciao. Sono Bio e sono felice di conoscerti. Sono diventata incontinente a 33 anni. Ora ne ho 41. Sono ancora relativamente giovane. Soffro di doppia incontinenza, sia urinaria che fecale, e non c'è modo di risolverla, quindi pannolini o cateteri sono le uniche soluzioni. E non voglio usare cateteri. All'inizio ero disperata. Volevo morire e non uscire mai più di casa. Poi, a poco a poco, ho deciso che volevo continuare a vivere e ho iniziato ad aprirmi un po' sui forum, dove ho scoperto che esistevano i feticisti dei pannolini, cosa di cui ignoravo completamente l'esistenza. Ma devo dirti che grazie ad alcuni di loro sono riuscita a ricostruire la mia vita. Oggi ho persino una ragazza. Non usa i pannolini, ma ha uno spirito molto materno. Ora non frequento più questi feticisti, ma mi hanno aiutato molto. E in ogni caso, se potessi tornare indietro, eviterei anch'io l'episodio che mi ha reso incontinente.

 

[MichaelDahlke]

Hello justey,

I can completely understand your frustration. Unfortunately, you can only keep these people away from such forums with a very restrictive moderation - which unfortunately does not take place here.

I don't know why that's so and I don't want to speculate about it now - but the fact is that I also find it annoying and therefore only look here irregularly.

However, it is probably not easy to keep such a forum alive. I believe that many people who have a continence problem are often on the road in other forums where it is about the underlying disease or the root cause and how to deal with it. Incontinence is often the smaller problem.

I'm just trying to somehow ignore the crap and hope to always read a few success stories from people who get rid of the problem again. I myself also suffer from a neurogenic storage and emptying disorder (bladder overdilation due to long unrecognized diabetes that has led to the fact that I have no perception of the bladder and herniated discs that have led to muscle and movement problems). As a result, I am severely urinary and moderately fecal incontinent. I would be particularly interested in experience reports from people with pacemakers - but there doesn't seem to be that much here.

In any way - thanks for the rant - it hits the point of view.

CU
Michael

 

[justej]

Hi. I'm Bio and I'm happy to meet you. I became incontinent at the age of 33. I'm 41 now. I'm still relatively young. I have double incontinence, both urinary and fecal, and there's no way to change that, so diapers or catheters are the only solutions. And I don't want to use catheters. At first, I was desperate about it. I wanted to die and never leave the house again. Then, little by little, I decided I wanted to keep living, and I started opening up a bit on forums, where I discovered that diaper fetishists existed, something I was completely unaware of. But I have to tell you that thanks to some of them, I've managed to rebuild my life. Today, I even have a girlfriend. She doesn't wear diapers, but she has a very maternal spirit. I don't hang out with these fetishists now, but they've helped me a lot. And in any case, if I could go back, I too would avoid the episode that made me incontinent.

Hi Bio!
I don’t doubt they can be helpful, but in my opinion they have their own forums and need to keep it there. I don’t need to see someone coming up with some story so they can do their fetish when I (and a lot of others I think) are just coming to get support. I dunno.

 

[justej]

Hello justey,

I can completely understand your frustration. Unfortunately, you can only keep these people away from such forums with a very restrictive moderation - which unfortunately does not take place here.

I don't know why that's so and I don't want to speculate about it now - but the fact is that I also find it annoying and therefore only look here irregularly.

However, it is probably not easy to keep such a forum alive. I believe that many people who have a continence problem are often on the road in other forums where it is about the underlying disease or the root cause and how to deal with it. Incontinence is often the smaller problem.

I'm just trying to somehow ignore the crap and hope to always read a few success stories from people who get rid of the problem again. I myself also suffer from a neurogenic storage and emptying disorder (bladder overdilation due to long unrecognized diabetes that has led to the fact that I have no perception of the bladder and herniated discs that have led to muscle and movement problems). As a result, I am severely urinary and moderately fecal incontinent. I would be particularly interested in experience reports from people with pacemakers - but there doesn't seem to be that much here.

In any way - thanks for the rant - it hits the point of view.

CU
Michael

I definitely agree, Michael. I was on a group on Facebook for folks who have a suprapubic catheter and because it wasn’t a general incontinence group we didn’t have the fetish crowd. I got rid of facebook so I guess I’m clinging to these kinds of forums for support. I dealt with urinary incontinence for 10 years. I had occasional bowel problems but it’s pretty consistent these days and it’s a whole different level. I could easily hide that I had an accident but with bowel stuff you can’t. It hasn’t happened while I’m out thankfully but it’s only a matter of time before it does. Luckily I have home health aides that I’m comfortable with in case I need help.

People can do whatever they want I on their forums whatever floats your boat but coming on to a medical site just feels disrespectful to me.

Thanks for hearing me out.

- elijah

 

[Fredy552]

Good morning,
I joined this group; I am not sure, maybe 1 2 years ago. I became Incontinent after getting COVID-19 and spending a month and a half in the hospital and then home recovery. Lost my smell and some taste, and of course, I am incontinent. I, or better yet, the nurses, discovered this in the hospital when I was wetting the bed. I have googled several sites to maybe help me answer some questions, sometimes trying to decide do I do drugs or hang a bag on my leg or what. Thanks to this group and your answers I have stayed with diapers and pull-ups. I am taking enough pills for stuff. I guess that is keeping me alive. Now as for the people that into fetish stuff go to your other websites. AS those of us who are truly Incontinent just ignore all that other. Oh and I am 70 and still working P/T and I do not let this problem slow me down on life.

 

[justej]

I’m with you Fredy!
I have a suprapubic catheter so I have a bag (Im an amputee and for some reason leg bags won’t stay on my non amp leg. I’m in a wheelchair so the bag just hangs below). I have had recent bowel incontinence join the party but I’ll be damned if I let it interfere with having a life. Now I’ll be honest, some days are better than others! I have times when I’m super self conscious. I’ve actually had people be nasty and rude about my bag. But I always tell people you are one accident away from being in my situation! I’m finally moving to a fully wheelchair accessible apartment next week and I know this move is a new beginning for me and is just going to open so many doors.

I’ve spent enough time being depressed about my situation. I’m trying to stay positive and live life!