Positivity

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I'd like to share some positivity. I've lived over half my life (I'm 51) with incontinence and nothing is different than anyone else. I dated, married, had kids, travel, socialize, and work fulltime.
I learned years ago the importance of being confident and finding humor. I'm quick to joke about my leaking plumbing or "sexy underwear" because humor removes awkwardness and confidence lets others know we're secure with ourselves.
I had a very good therapist tell me years ago that "people see us as we see ourselves"!
I'm more than happy to answer questions or share what works if anyone has a specific question(s).

We do not have to be victims or be defined as "broken"!!

 

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Nice to hear from you again!

I agree completely!

Very interesting statement from your therapist. Very insightful.

I just recently decided that just being outright about all this just simplifies it with family and friends.
Mom and youngest daughter already knows about it. Hasn't been a problem. It just has made everything a lot simpler getting it out, but it just makes me wonder, maybe the people I admit this to, could be so accepting, but don't want to say so, because it really is so much more common than actually realized?

 

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I agree that being open about the incontinence is a good thing. It helps you and I have been surprised the number of others who have been helped by openness. Why should this issue which must be managed be any different from the myriad of other conditions that must also be managed. I admire your positivity. I must admit I struggle quite a bit from time to time mentally. I had RP 9 months ago and although I have improved a lot sometimes I can't bear the thought of living the rest of my life like this. I have read positive thinking books and tried " thankfulness" by recording three things that I should be thankful for each day. I have considered other people who have even bigger challenges than I do. But even with all of this I still have negative thoughts and stress filled moments. How have you managed to keep positive?

 

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CES97,
Taking a cue from your Imoge, I love that C8 Corvette! More to your point, I’ve lived with incontinence since I was 27, and yes it was a huge blow to my world 30 years ago. I was lucky to meet a Psychologist from Kinsey Institute (My urologist’s wife!) and she really helped my wrap my head around moving forward & living my best life. You are absolutely spot on that it all falls to how you present yourself is almost always the way you will be treated. In the same accident my neck, back, legs, knees, hip, pelvis, right arm, and right shoulder were severely damaged. I had my plate full. Incontinence was just a manageable part of my recovery.I ended up doing a lot of my rehab at the same place a lot of San Diego Chargers football players rehabbed, they were all extremely supportive and often shocked at my attitude to win! I spent a lot of football games on the sidelines in the following years and didn’t realize that “I” was that “it could be worse” guy to them!
I’ve raced BMW Motorcycles & Porches at Road America for years while living in Chicago. Now I get up to VIR every chance I get! I can’t ride right now, or risk a high speed wreck as I’ve had 15+ neck & spine surgeries and promised my wife I’d take it down a notch, so I built a Rock Crawler Jeep with a racing cage, so even if I go over it’s not only my butt that’s well padded!
Wishing all the Best in the New Year!

 

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I agree that being open about the incontinence is a good thing. It helps you and I have been surprised the number of others who have been helped by openness. Why should this issue which must be managed be any different from the myriad of other conditions that must also be managed. I admire your positivity. I must admit I struggle quite a bit from time to time mentally. I had RP 9 months ago and although I have improved a lot sometimes I can't bear the thought of living the rest of my life like this. I have read positive thinking books and tried " thankfulness" by recording three things that I should be thankful for each day. I have considered other people who have even bigger challenges than I do. But even with all of this I still have negative thoughts and stress filled moments. How have you managed to keep positive?

I credit my wife the most for constantly reminding me how blessed we are. She's been to all of my Dr appointments and knows how much worse it could be. I focus a lot on my small business and that really helps as well as a few hobbies.

 

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CES97,
Taking a cue from your Imoge, I love that C8 Corvette! More to your point, I’ve lived with incontinence since I was 27, and yes it was a huge blow to my world 30 years ago. I was lucky to meet a Psychologist from Kinsey Institute (My urologist’s wife!) and she really helped my wrap my head around moving forward & living my best life. You are absolutely spot on that it all falls to how you present yourself is almost always the way you will be treated. In the same accident my neck, back, legs, knees, hip, pelvis, right arm, and right shoulder were severely damaged. I had my plate full. Incontinence was just a manageable part of my recovery.I ended up doing a lot of my rehab at the same place a lot of San Diego Chargers football players rehabbed, they were all extremely supportive and often shocked at my attitude to win! I spent a lot of football games on the sidelines in the following years and didn’t realize that “I” was that “it could be worse” guy to them!
I’ve raced BMW Motorcycles & Porches at Road America for years while living in Chicago. Now I get up to VIR every chance I get! I can’t ride right now, or risk a high speed wreck as I’ve had 15+ neck & spine surgeries and promised my wife I’d take it down a notch, so I built a Rock Crawler Jeep with a racing cage, so even if I go over it’s not only my butt that’s well padded!
Wishing all the Best in the New Year!

Our injury stories are quiet similar, I was forced to hang up my leathers after my last accident, haven't rode a motorcycle since. I do track a few different cars and recently acquired a Radical SR3 but the high G load is something that I'm still getting used to.

 

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Got some good news today. First PSA post RP on September 28 was less than 0.01. My incontinence has greatly improved from 6-7 pads per day down to 2. Now hopefully the ED will begin to improve.

 

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@Jimfrompa - good news, and still less than six months into your recovery. You are tracking well!

 

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Thanks Phil. Had a rough beginning with clotting and bleeding and catheter for 3 weeks. Now back to work without eternal catheter. Also almost back to pre RP exercise routine. Looking forward to even more improvement in 2023. Praying for the best for all here.

 

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Just realized today was exactly 3 months since RP surgery.