EXTERNAL CONDOM - Turned into a nightmare from Hades

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Since I saw the "nurse practitioner / pelvic floor trainer / External Condom "EXPERT"" prior to the lackluster and incomplete visit with the enshrined surgeon that burned out my benign and huge prostate 8-1/2 months ago, leaving me with dribbling that daily Kegels did NOTHING for --

Here is my first and last experience with using an External Condom.

The day of my appointment, where Nurse Practitioner gave me a hodge-podge of condoms, only a leg bag, no night-time hanging bag, I called the company on the one sheet, HOLLISTER, who makes these supplies, and they were very kind to overnight me a hanging bag, condoms with the extra adhesive, and speak to me in detail how to put on the condom (which I already basically knew) and how to attach the tubing and make certain it is sealed.

I was awake in bed, watching TV, for two hours, periodically checking around the condom, the fittings, the bag. Virtually very little urine entered the tubing, and I was drinking purposely over 18 oz. of water.

Then, after sleeping for 1-1/2 hours, my hip was hurting me, so I carefully turned to the other side.

All hell broke loose. Urine started leaking rapidly, drenching the diaper + thick pad I had on.

I very quickly, though carefully, got out of bed, and ran to the toilet. Urine was leaking out of the "70% extra adhesive" condom, which I removed. I threw the diaper on the floor. I then had to wash myself from urine 3 times, thoroughly dry myself, and put on a new diaper and stick-on heavy pad.

I then quickly went to look at my bed. The fitted sheet had a 9" wet circle, but worse, the pad that covers my 4" memory foam topper was somewhat soaked with urine. I was very lucky I caught it this quickly, or it would have leaked into the foam topper (who knows if it did & I couldn't tell).

I began using a wet washcloth with a little shampoo on it, wiping back and forth on every surface, and then rinsing the washcloth at least twice, to go over these areas to get the soap and urine left off.

Then I poured some 91% alcohol on another washcloth, and gently blotted over and over those areas of the bed. I then used a hair dryer to dry them. It still looks like there are some rings around those areas, so I don't think I accomplished a comlete removal of urine. I'll have to wash the sheet and the topper cover.

After this experience, I don't want anything to do with external condoms. I did everything exactly as described and illustrated - I am certain of that. I used the right size condom, as per the penis measurement card they provide you, so the size fit my penis best.

Anyone who has used these, please tell me your experience.

 

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Oh my word, what a shocking nightmare! I’m sorry for the mess and disappointment you experienced.

 

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Hi olwi, please correct me if I'm wrong but I've always had the impression that at least for an active person such as yourself that condom catheters and bags were best for daytime use. Paralyzed people who can't move around much on their own may find the condom catheter and bag are effective. Frankly I'd be leery of wearing that sort of thing to bed because I'm sure I move around quite a bit when sleeping and you change positions a lot and that would tend to dislodge the condom itself or may even disconnect it from the bag. I know I've woken up in strange positions that I don't remember at all getting into. And when something like that happens, anything at all can happen with the condom cath and bag. For that very reason I would stick to a diaper and pad.

 

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billliveshere

I'm NOT an active person. Yes, I can certainly move around, but I'm basically homebound because I don't have a car, am stuck in an old home in the far boonies, have suffered from depression for decades.

I've progressively deteriorated both emotionally and physically. Moving to where I am for 18 years has taken a toll.

I don't need a condom bag during the day. I described what I wear that helps me prevent having to change the cheap Depends diapers but every two days. I place a thick, stick-on pad over the inside of the diaper (I get these pads for free through my "OTC quarterly benefit" from my Medicare Advantage plan. Unfortunately, they only provide one type of diaper with straps that I tried, and they are impossible to use. Then, I take two industrial white paper towels (like you used to (still get at some business' bathrooms), which are folded in 3. I then fold the two I layer over each other, in half, and place that on top of the stick-on pad inside the diaper where most leakage will get sucked up in the paper towels.

As long as I change those paper towels before they get drenched (about every 2-3 hours), I can function in the house fine.

However, if I stoop and move alot, or engage in vacuuming, I'll have more leakage, and have to check more frequently.

The worst is when I have to cut the grass of the acre I am on, which I do on a tractor, which when done I sit on a cheap $1 foam pad on the ground to clean the underside of the tractor (a bit fanatical) as it gets packed with wet grass which eats away at the paint on the underside of the deck. Or, when I pick up sticks from the too many trees, bending up and down to do so, and that can create much more leakage.

When I tried the external condom for sleep last night....well, you know what happened. It remains an enigma to me as I had the right size condom, I'm certain, and yet when I made my first turn from one side fo the other side, that is when urine started coming out, and if I hadn't reacted as fast as I had, I'd probably have to throw the mattress topper, sheats, blankets in the garbage.

I was like you - waking up in strange positions, but for some reason, I don't move that much that I'm aware of while sleeping as I used to. Since I can't sleep on my back, except when forced to because of the hip pain, I wake up from the hip pain, and am in about the same position I went to sleep in.

Rather the diaper & pad when this condom nightmare. I'd be afraid to try it a second time for fear of a repeat tragedy, plus, it is a drag to have to move the catheter tube over your head each time you turn.

 

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I am wide-open incontinent since my radical prostatectomy in 2005 (age 59 then) and got by for several years with cunningham clamps and pad for insurance. Lived my life having to get to a bathroom every 2 hours.

For the past 3+ years I've been using external condoms. I empty every 4 hours or so, but longer overnight. I restrict fluid intake after dinner.

I'm handicapped including weak fingers so minimize frequency of changing the bag and the condom. I use a HI-N-Dry belly bag (only about 400 cc) day and night. Problems occur with (1)rare disconnect of condom from bag, (2) forgetting to close valve, or (3) sleeping too late and hydrostatic pressure from overfilled urine pushes me out of the condom.

I'm circumcised and think it'd be more difficult otherwise.

I have 2 modifications that I think helped me.
(A) I have a plastic loop from which hang the bag from the valve (points up under my briefs) to grab to facilitate keeping everything lined up. (Avoid kinks in the system) And when I get up in the morning I grasp it and walk to the bathroom taking the weight of the filled bag off the condom.
(B) I have two 1/4" wide rubber bands slipped into cord locks that I tighten around the penis-filled condom (proximally and distally) for extra assurance that it doesn't slip off.

OLWI: At what point did your system come apart? I wonder if you were kinked so urine built up behind a dam...causing all Hades to break loose.

 

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Mel, thanks for writing. Sorry for what you have to live with. Sounds like you've expended much effort to find what works for your situation.

Perhaps my big mistake was drinking 16 oz. of water after putting everything together and laying down in bed. I did this to test that infernal hanging bag behind my head. Yes, it was lower, but the tubing had to a significant curl for the say 6 inch extra length, which I thought would be needed to avoid nighttime movement from yanking on the condom.

From what Hollister sent me, which was the hanging bag, and several two size condoms, the smaller size I felt matched their measurement tool, and there would be less chance than if it were slightly oversized, of coming off. These condoms had 70% more adhesive. Ran the tube from out the near the bottom side of my diaper, followed by the extra 6 inch "loop" outside the diaper.

I warmed the condom with my hand, and then turned on my side, with a body pillow between my legs (as I always have to use, or my hips would be paining me more than they do (two 1-1/2 to 2 hours for the pain around the top of the femur. There were no kinks. The drain shut-off valve was open, though being at the tucked in drain end, I don't see it would make any difference even if it were shut, as it has a plug you have to remove to drain the bag. I checked everything. Full adhesion of the condom, and a short apace at the end, so my penis was not jammed all the way to the very top of the condom.

Then, I turned. I can't remember if I went to sleep, but I think I did, only to wake up finding urine leaking out. The hose was not kinked. The condom was on and I thought sealed, but when I jumped up, grabbed the bag and ran to the bathroom, there was leakage coming through where it was sealed. I didn't have time to evaluate it, as I needed to get it off, and get the urine to flow from my penis into the toilet. The side of the diaper I was laying on was wet. I pulled it off and threw it on the tile floor.

That's the best description I can give you....

The Dr. didn't want me to wear it 24/7, because he said it would make me dependent upon it, and unable to maintain the partial continence I have, and do the new pelvic floor exercises, which, as I described in another topic I have here, when doing them, give me no feeling of using any pelvic muscles, such as Kegels give you when you tighten from your anal sphincter forward to the base of your shaft.

 

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Well olwi, I have to admit I'm, stumped! it sounds like you're doing everything you should do. The only possibility (and it's admittedly a remote one) I can see is the tube with the extra six inch loop. But you do need to have some extra length to accommodate you moving around. How long have you used this system? As with trying anything new it's a matter of just experimenting and seeing what works best for you. If it were me I'd probably just try to experiment with various lengths of tubing as well as trying different ways to attach the condom itself to you. Barring that, it may just be good to call Hollister and ask to speak to a nurse or a similar specialist. I would think there would be someone like that in customer service.

 

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I had bs experiences with condom Cathy when I was in the seizure monitoring unit they wanted me to use them rather than my diapers. They brought some in for me and I thought ok, woke up soaked to my chest, urine was no going into the tube and the Cath slipped off. The person that was there to help me she came in when I pushed the call button. When she saw I was soaked she helped with getting bedding changed and she asked if she could try and see how the cath had failed. The cath was to big she got the smaller size and checked the fit which she said I don’t think this size will ok either. I heard her over the speaker thing saying I think the small is going to slip off also, the actual nurse said that they use pediatric large at times like this, I was humiliated. It was like 20 minutes which I had already soaked the bed again after they had not responded and not being allowed to get out of the bed. When the two ladies returned they were very nice and helped with the bedding once again the nurse at this point said we had to get a different size for you to try. I at this point said I am not going to use them, I will use my diapers. I told them it is bad enough I heard you guys talking that there were pediatric size for me that would work. Wearing and even changing my diapers in front of the camera was much less embarrassing to having my bedding changed and possibly have another size not work. I know that I am very small in size but condom caths are the work of the devil in my case. The kinking of the tubing is why it would back up and would allow the cath to slip off me. I definitely do not recommend them at least for my needs.
I do wish they would work for me at least overnight, it would be a little freedom from diapers and be able to air out.

 

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Once it was recommended to me to use a condom catheter for bed wetting rather than a diaper to allow my skin to recover and air out. I wasn't comfortable going that route and dealing with all the tubing. Instead, I used double reusable bed pads and no diaper for a short while. It was a good short term solution to get my skin better.

 

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From reading these posts here, I think condom catheters would probably only work for a select few. I'm used to wearing something absorbent which to me is comfortable, and I would be quite skeptical if someone told me I needed to use a condom catheter. That said, using that system would take quite a bit of practice to learn how to do it and it would take time to get used to it. @Wbwayne11 I could see how the tube can kink and then urine would back up and allow the catheter to slip off. Just plain old physics there! I myself would be most uncomfortable having to deal with the tubing, unless I were drugged or next to unconscious, or had just had major surgery.
And @Jamie325, I think using reusable bed pads temporarily would be a reasonable solution if you need your skin to recover and air out. If it were me I know that tubing would get in the way, particularly for an active person who moves around in bed during the night.

 

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Yeah, it was a waste of time and money for me. I move around too much, and it doesn't take much movement to completely kink the tubing causing other problems. I think these are really only helpful for people who are paralyzed and therefore who don't move around at all.

 

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They were good for me. I did make sure I had nothing else over the top of it as I found urine would back up otherwise melting the glue and then causing a pop off or blow back. I made sure pubic hair was at a minimum length down there and made sure i didn't use any form of moisturising cream on my skin down there, otherwise it would leak and pop off. You could try it without a diaper over and attach a retaining strap to your leg and see if that might help but otherwise i am sorry it didn't work for you. These are not good for everyone sadly.

 

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Hi @jeffswet, I agree 100 percent! If diapers work for you then why waste time, money and energy with something that may or may not even work?
And @laalaauk, It sounds like you were able to find a way to have catheters work for you and that's good as it gives you an option.
But you're right, everyone is different and they may not work for some of us.

 

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Hey, condoms sometimes break during sex, with a teeny amount of seminal fluid release. I can’t imagine them working well with anything to do with ounces of urine!!!

 

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@snow... What is sex?

 

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Are we being sarcastic @laalaauk???? Sounds like something I'd say. And it also sounds like a joke I saw. I'll try to remember it as it appeared, so here goes!
A boy in first grade came home from school one day. His dad was home and asked the boy about his day at school. The boy said it was "okay," the usual things kids say when asked about school.
He then asked, "Dad, what is sex?"
The dad was quite taken aback and realized that the kids of today are so much more sophisticated than when he was the same age. The dad explained that a man meets a woman and they date and get to know one another. And then the man and woman fall in love and begin to make plans for their future. The boy's dad then explains how a couple begins to feel a deep love for one another and talks about mutual respect and all of the ingredients for successful love. Then he explains how babies are made and how that takes nine months.
About 30 minutes later, the dad ask the boy, "Does that answer your question?"
The boy then gave his dad a form that the teacher gave him to take home to his parents. Pointing to the form, the boy said, "Yes it does, but how am I going to fit all of that into this little tiny square?"
(OK, OK, I know what you all are thinking! That I really need to keep my daytime job!!!)

 

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@laalaauk Mwah ha ha! Too true!

 

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@billliveshere Who me?, I don't know what you mean!

 

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@laalaauk, Yep, you! Cheers!